Baby Mama
by Msjanelle32
Summary: Emily wants a baby. Alison doesn't. But sometimes, what you want isn't necessarily what you need. Emison. With heavy mentions of Ezria, Haleb and Spoby. Set about ten years into the future.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I have an idea for this story. Set in the future, slightly AU. Let me know what you think. **

* * *

_The Liars have been rid of A for the past 5 years. After college, the girls came face to face with their tormentor: the secret spawn of Ali's mother and Spencer's father. Looks like Jason's twin sister was not as mentally stable as her mother thought. After the sadistic sibling was forever put away, the Liars started to finally live a normal life. Aria and Ezra finally got their act together her sophomore year of college. They were married two years later, and the couple is expecting their first child. Ezra has a teaching job at Hollis, while Aria works at Rosewood High as a Literature teacher. Spencer and Toby have been going strong since senior year. Despite her qualms about him becoming a police officer, she learned to accept his career choice and supported him unconditionally. Spencer followed in her mother's footsteps and is working her way up to being Rosewood's most respected lawyer. Hanna and Caleb continued their rollercoaster of a romance until finally deciding to take a break. After a year apart, they finally decided they were better together. And after a passion filled reunion, the outcome was a very unsuspected pregnancy. Hanna and Caleb are now proud parents of two year old Zoe. Emily and Alison danced around each other for years. The second half of senior year, Emily and Ali finally started dating. Despite the obvious trust issues that put a strain on the relationship, the love shared between the two made it worthwhile. After four months of dating, the Liars were finally graduating. Well, all except Ali. The blonde had to stay behind a year and finish up some missing credits. That year was a tough year for the couple, the distance proving to be too much. Along with the unresolved trust issues, the couple decided to split. They remained friends, both not wanting to break the group apart. Despite having a few 'slips', as Aria calls it, throughout the years the two remained friendly. Until Emily's junior year of college, when a girl from her psych class developed feelings for her and asked her out. This caused a mix of emotions to stir up in the blonde beauty, who ultimately declared her love for Emily. The two reconciled and have been monogamous ever since. Emily now works as the Chemistry teacher/ Swim coach at Rosewood High. Ali works with Hanna at a boutique they co-own. The story picks up in Hanna's backyard, where the gang is celebrating Zoe's second birthday._

* * *

Emily Fields scanned the area of her best friend's backyard. It was filled with an immense amount of balloons and character decorations. She smiled to herself at just how spoiled her little niece was. At the ripe age of two she had her parents along with her extended aunts and uncles wrapped around her little finger. She watched as Hanna beamed down in pride as her daughter clung to her aunt Spencer, babbling how great her ballet class was. Aria watched in amusement as her hands subconsciously drifted to her barely visible baby bump. She was eight weeks along, and her and Ezra couldn't be happier. Emily's eyes drifted to the last member of the group, the love of her life. Ali's blonde hair cascaded down her hair in loose curls. She watched as the blonde's hair dipped back in laughter at something the toddler said. Emily smiled to herself. She would give anything to have a family, a family with Ali. The brunette didn't understand why the blonde refused to become a mother. She was great with kids, she had a nurturing side of her that could only be classified as a mothering instinct. And Emily was sure that any child with the blonde's genetics would be the most adorable thing on the planet. But the blonde had relentlessly refused. She claimed that she wasn't fit to be a mother, that she could never make a child endure what she had to experience. Emily tried to convince her that she was different, that she was not her mother. But all of Emily's pleas were brushed off. Ali was convinced that motherhood was not for her. But Emily saw the sparkle in her eye whenever she was around Zoe, or when a child came into the boutique. She loved children. Emily just had to convince her that she loved them. Emily made her way over to her group of friends. As she approached the group, the tiny blonde automatically reached for her favorite aunt, Emily swooped her out of Spencer's arms and immediately snuggled her little Hanna.

"Yeah. Okay, Zoe. Nice talking to you." Spencer muttered slightly jealous of the lack of affection from the two year old.

"She just loves Em, because she spoils the girl rotten." Hanna said with a smirk as Emily glared at her from behind Zoe.

"I do not."

"Yeah? Then why was her birthday present more expensive than mine? Hmm?" Ali replied with a mischievous grin adorning her face.

"You didn't want a trampoline. Zoe did." Emily replied nonchalantly. "She's my only niece. I need someone to pour my affections into. When mini Ezra gets here I swear I'll spoil him just as much."

"Why are you so convinced I'm having a boy?" Aria asked curiously, "I barely told you guys two weeks ago."

"Don't doubt the genie, Aria." Hanna comments to the shortest of the bunch. "She was convinced Zoe was a girl from five weeks along. She was obviously right."

"Well I want a girl. I want her name to be Eriza."

"What!?" The four other members of the group questioned in unison.

"Its our names smushed together." Aria defends, "You can't name a boy, Eriza."

"You shouldn't name a dog Eriza." Spencer retorts, "That's just cruel."

"I like it and it's unique."

"We better pray it's a boy." Hanna mutters receiving a mild glare from Aria. Alison stays uncharacteristically quiet during the baby talk. Already knowing Emily is going ambush her with a conversation as soon as they returned home.

"When are you guys gonna get yourself a baby?" Spencer asked directing the question at the couple of the group. Emily's eyes immediately sought Ali's, the blonde keeping her gaze fixed on her shoes.

"I don't know, Spence. Why don't I just put .'baby' down on the grocery list, I'll be sure to pick one up next time at the market." Ali bit back, clearly uncomfortable.

"It was a question. Lighten up." Spencer replied as her stare held Ali's. These two never backed down to an argument, especially to each other.

"How about you, Spence?" Aria began desperately trying to change the subject. "Are you and Toby trying?"

"We're not trying, but we're not trying to prevent a pregnancy, either." Spencer replied as she reluctantly tore her gaze from Ali's. "We're heading up to the lake house for our three year anniversary in a few months. Trust me, we'll have loads of time to practice."

A loud yawn emitted from Zoe's lips as she snuggled into Emily's neck. The little girl had a long day, the events of which were starting to catch up to her. Emily kissed the little girl on the forehead as she handed the girl to her mother. The baby blonde let out a slight whine.

"I go with Aun' Emmy." The toddler declared sleepily. Emily walked over to her god daughter and swept blonde curls from her face.

"Next week, okay sugar? You can send the weekend with me and Aunt Ali." Emily offered. "That sound okay?" She got a mumbled 'tay' from the baby's lips. Hanna called Caleb over, from where he was sharing a beer with Toby and Ezra. He immediately scooped up his daughter and hoisted her up on his shoulder. He bid goodbye to his friends, and carried his baby girl into the house.

"Well, the birthday girl is out. I guess that's our cue to leave." Aria suggested as Ezra came behind her and placed a hand the small of her back. "Em, is it my turn for coffee? Or yours?"

"Its yours. But every time you go you seem to forget that you need to order decaf."

Aria responded with an eye roll and sticking her tongue out at her best friend and colleague.

"7:30, my room?" Emily offered and Aria agreed. She bid goodbye to everyone. As her and Ezra left the backyard.

"You ready to go, babe?" Alison asks her lover as she intertwines their fingers together. Emily gives her a soft smile and the duo follow after Aria.

"You okay?" Emily asks her girlfriend softly once they're inside Emily's car.

"I guess so." Ali replies half heartedly.

Emily doesn't press. She knows what's wrong with the blonde. She knows what conversation they're going to have when they get home. But she can't help but feeling that this night is going to change everything.

* * *

"Why can't you just consider changing your mind? For me?" Emily shoots at the blonde who is currently sitting on the couch downing a bottle of red. "I mean, I let you talk me out of getting married. Even though I don't entirely agree on your reasoning." Ali had insisted that they didn't get married. Claiming that even though gay marriage was legal in Pennsylvania, it was still fascist knowing that there was even a ban on it at all. "I don't see the big deal, Ali. You're great with kids. You'd be a great Mom."

"I don't want to be a mother." Ali replied. "That was never a goal of mine. I refuse to become Jessica Dilaurentis."

"You won't be. I promise, you're just scared-"

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Em."

"Ali, every promise I make you I intend to keep. Just trust me on this." Emily pleaded. She saw her lover's eyes soften as the blonde contemplated her words. And then Emily saw Alison's eyes harden, which was never good.

"Just look at your life ten years from now. What do you see?" Emily tried as a last ditch attempt to convince the blonde. "I see us, in a big house. Your boutique has just expanded to the bigger location you and Hanna talk about. And my swim team has just won the state championship. We've just purchased a puppy and our child is ecstatic about it. Sometimes, I see a little boy with your eyes. Or a girl with my smile. Our child is running around chasing the puppy, while you and I sip white wine and talk about our day." Emily finishes with a dreamy smile. Alison downs the contents of her now fourth glass of red wine.

"I see, me and you in your sexy little red bikini on some hot beach in the middle of December. I see us sipping Margaritas and taking shots of tequila. That's where I want to be in ten years." Emily sighs clearly agitated. "Don't you care about what I want? Do you care about my dreams?"

"The same question goes to you." Ali replies challenging the brunette. "Have you ever stopped to think that I don't want a child with you? That bringing a child into this world with you is the last thing on my bucket list?" The blonde shouts her last accusation, with venom on her lips. She sees the hurt flash through her lovers eyes, and she immediately regrets it. Blue eyes are locked with brown for what seems like an eternity.

"I can't do this right now, I have to go." The blonde admits as she leaves to gather her things. She hadn't meant to hurt Emily. And she needed to get out of there before she ruined the only good in her life. Permanently.

"You can't leave every time something doesn't go your way, Ali!" Emily exclaims, clearly enraged. "We're not seventeen anymore!" Ali grabs the rest of her wine bottle and makes her way to the door. She doesn't dare to look back at Emily, because she knows if she did her resolve would crumble in seconds. She tries to ignore the sob that emits from her throat as the door clicks shut.

* * *

Alison sits at the bar, alone with her own personal bottle of Jack Daniels. She hates fighting with Emily, but fighting about babies is the worst ever. She's used to being able to give Emily anything her little heart desires. But with this, she just can't give in. She vowed to herself at a young age that she would never become the woman her mother was. And if not marrying or having a baby with Emily kept her from following in her mother's footsteps, then so be it. It was a sacrifice that she was willing to make. Alison threw back another shot of whiskey, and tried to drink away any thought of her mother, who she blamed for her predicament. As Ali continued to drink her sorrows away, she didn't notice a warm body that had occupied the stool next to her.

"Go away." She commanded with a slight slur as she downed another shot. She turned and faced her unwanted visitor. She recognized him almost immediately: he was Toby's partner a guy who she had met on several occasions.

"You're my man, Toby's friend. Aren't ya?" The officer asked with a slur. "The one who owns the store? What are you doing here all by your lonesome?"

"I'm trying to be alone." The blonde replied icily at the intoxicated police officer.

"Oh! Me too!" He exclaimed enthusiastically, "I got into a fight with my girl." He finished rather somberly. "She's mad at me."

"And why's that?" Alison asked feeling the slightest bit of empathy for him.

"She thinks I'm cheating!"

"And are you?"

"Well, not anymore I'm not." He admitted sheepishly. "I had a couple slips with my ex about 6 months ago. But ever since then I've been good."

"Do you blame her for being suspicious?"

"I've been good since then! She still thinks I'm the same guy I was back in high school. But I'm not." Ali didn't know if she was drunk, or high off of the feeling of empathy but she was feeling a strong pull towards her newfound companion. She urged him to keep talking.

"She wants to get married." He sighed. "Even though we are practically married she wants to be 'legal'." He laughed, "Honestly, I'm only still with her because she's pregnant."

"You're going to have a baby?" Alison asked, wide eyed. She was feeling the effects of the whiskey more than ever now.

"She's due in a few months." He sighed. "I want to be a good dad, I do. But something is holding me back. I don't know, I'm confused. Why are you here Blondie?" He asked while downing another shot.

"My girl is mad at me too." She confessed sadly.

"Maybe we just need to forget about our women for one night?" He asked half questioning.

"I don't ever want to forget about Emily." Ali sighed at the thought of her girl. She was amazing. And she loved her.

"I love my girl too." The officer replied taking another shot. "But sometimes, you must remember: its okay to lose control every once in awhile." With that, Toby's partner got up from the bar and sauntered his way over to where the restrooms were located. Ali contemplated his words. Lose control? Alison felt her whole life she was trying to do the opposite. She always liked to have control of situations. Whether it be with her friends, or her parents or even at work. She always had some type of control of the situation. She rarely let herself get caught up in the moment, a state of vulnerability is a weak one. So maybe, just this once. She's allowed to lose a bit of control. Just maybe, she'll let whatever was supposed to happen, happen. She won't try to control anything. So she took a long drag of her Jack Daniel's, and slowly made her way to the bathroom stalls.

* * *

By the time she regained control of the situation, it was too late. She had committed the most unforgivable betrayal known to mankind, and she hated herself for it. As she made her way out of the stall, she decided right then and there that she could not lose Emily. Losing control felt good in the moment, but not as good as Emily's love made her feel. She vowed that she would spend the rest of her life making it up to Emily. The love of her life could never know about her infidelity. No one could.

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**A/N: So I don't even knew where this came from. Let me know what you think. I kinda know where this story will go, but I'm up for suggestions. Shoot me a review or PM. Either is much appreciated!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So thanks for the reviews, despite if they were positive or negative I appreciate them. I know you think this plotline is overused, and yeah maybe it is. But if you stay with me, I promise its not going to be as generic as you think. **

* * *

Alison woke with a pounding headache. Why did she do this to herself? Jack Daniels was most certainly not her friend. She looked around for the first time since she awoke, she was in her and Emily's shared bathroom laying on the tile floor. She was still in her clothes from the birthday party, so she figured that it would be best for everyone if she showered. She slowly stripped, her head throbbing with every move she made. She finally got herself positioned under the scalding spray, and she let herself just simmer. As the hot water continued to roll down her body, the memories of the previous day came crashing in. She remembers their argument, storming out, drinking and losing control. The last memory makes her want to throw up, and not because of her hangover. She hated herself for being weak. She supposes her mother is laughing at her from her grave, knowing that her youngest daughter has potentially destroyed the best thing to happen to her. But, she shakes it off. She cannot look the least bit of guilty. Emily will read her like a book. She steps out of the shower and moves to the bedroom to dress slowly. She's nervous about confronting her girlfriend. She's been so honest and open with the girl for years, and having to result back to lies and secrets just kills her. As she makes her way out of the bedroom she's instantly met with the smell of French toast and fresh coffee. She smiles warmly at the taller girl, love and guilt burning equally in her heart. Emily turns her head and catches the blonde gazing at her.

"Good morning, pukey." She greets teasing the blonde beauty. "I'm glad you showered. It was starting to smell pretty gnarly in there." She laughed as she turned her back towards the stove. Alison smiled at the goofy chemistry teacher, who was an excellent french toast maker. The blonde wrapped her arms around the brunette from behind and buried her nose into the taller girl's neck. She inhaled greedily, before pressing a kiss behind her earlobe. Ali smiled as she felt Emily shiver beneath her touch. Alison tightened her hold in her girlfriend before offering up a genuine apology.

"I'm sorry, baby."

"Its fine, Ali-"

"No." The blonde stated firmly, "its not okay. I said some pretty nasty things last night. And I'm ashamed for hurting you."

"I know you're sorry, baby." Emily cooed gently. "But you've got to stop leaving. When you leave nothing ever gets resolved."

"I know," the blonde admitted softly. "I'm just afraid that one day, you'll realize that I'm the same old bitch from high school. And you'll leave me."

"I love you." Emily stated firmly. "Hell, I loved you when you were that bitch from high school. And don't sell yourself short. You've changed. I've changed. And we're better for it. I trust you completely with my heart."

The blonde buried her head deeper into Emily's neck, afraid that the guilt would eat her up.

"I love you." Alison replied softly as she turned Emily around to face her.

"And I love you." The brunette' eyes shone with love as she leaned down to kiss her lover. Alison sighed into the kiss, savoring every moment of it. The duo ate their breakfast engaging in small talk throughout. Emily was teaching her kids a new experiment involving hydrochloric acid that she was super excited about. Ali chimed in about how Hanna was pressuring her into remodeling the dressing rooms, which were redone three years ago. The two easily cleaned up the kitchen and decided that because of Alison's hungover state, a snuggly Sunday was how they were going to spend the rest of the day. Ali flopped down on the couch first, easing the brunette into her. Despite popular belief, Emily loved being the little spoon. They settled into each other as if their bodies were designed to fit as one. Emily controlled the remote, lazily flipping through channels, while Alison's hand lazily drug through thick brunette locks. Emily settled on a rerun of the Big Bang Theory, while the couple settled into a comfortable silence. After some time, Emily's voice finally brought Alison back to reality.

"We still have to finish yesterdays conversation, Ali."

"I know."

"Well?" Emily urged silencing the television, needing the blonde to open up to her.

"Em, you know my mother and I did not have the best relationship. And if I'm the slightest bit like her, this child would not have the childhood it deserves."

"Ali. Every parent makes mistakes with their children. Even though my Mom and I are close, there were countless times where she felt she had failed me. There are going to be risks, I won't lie to you. But the end result, a baby who loves us unconditionally. Our little gift to the world. A perfect combination of us both. That on its own is worth any risk." Emily finished, eyes locking with her lovers trying to convey the depth of her words.

"Em, I have no doubt in my mind that you'd be a wonderful mother. And I'm sorry I've been projecting my insecurities on you." Alison replied earnestly. "And if I'm being honest with myself, I have a soft spot for those tiny humans." Emily grinned triumphantly. She knew it. "And one day, in the future maybe I see us on the beach in December. But instead of drinking Margaritas maybe we're building a sandcastle.." Alison admitted shyly. "But I'm not ready. Not yet. But one day, I will be. Just, don't give up on me, Emily Fields. Because you are the best thing that has ever happened to me." Emily's heart burst with joy at the blonde's confession. A wide smile split her face in two as she hugged the smaller girl.

"Thank you, Ali. You have no idea how much this means to me." Emily leaned in and swiftly kissed the blonde, before once again turning over to continue their lazy day. But the fact of the matter was that Alison did know how much those words had meant to her girlfriend. That's why she said them. They weren't a complete lie. She did have a soft spot for kids. And she did vow that she would do anything in her power to make sure Emily was forever hers. And if having a kid kept Emily happy and unsuspecting, then she would do it. Sure, it was selfish but she was desperate. And obviously she would learn to love the kid, but her first priority was keeping Emily. That would always be most important.

* * *

Before school coffee dates with Aria had become a ritual ever since the girls were both hired. It had started three years prior, on the first day of school when a very nervous Aria walked into Emily's chemistry lab rambling about how she was going screw up the lives of innocent teenagers. Emily had quickly diffused the miniature brunette by forcing her to sit down and finish what was left of Emily's coffee. She then began to confess all of her insecurities to her tanned best friend, who shared some of the same ones. They kept meeting before school to talk about insecurities, until one day the conversation changed to course material, or specific problematic students. Now, these morning meetings were just Aria and Emily one on one time.

"So, Ali looked a little tense on Saturday. What was that all about?" Aria asked curiously.

"She gets tense when we talk about babies."

"Why?"

"Well up until yesterday, she was refused to talk about having kids. She thinks that if she becomes a mom, then she would end up like her mother." Emily confesses to her friend.

"Well what changed her mind?" Aria prodded

"I'm not sure, we got into a pretty heated argument and she stormed out, like usual." Aria rolled her eyes at her friend's confession. Typical Ali. "When she came back, we she was really drunk. She was crying, kept repeating that she loved me. I don't know, maybe she had a drunk epiphany or something." Emily concluded.

"That doesn't sound like Ali. The only one out of all of us that has drunk epiphanies is Hanna." Aria commented.

"You're right. I just don't want to look into it. I'm tired of fighting with her about this." Emily signed.

"You're gonna have to decide, Em. What do you want more: a baby or Ali." As Aria finished her sentence, the bell chimed and the sound of rushing feet emitted from the halls. The friends made plans for lunch, and as Aria exited the room Emily was left with her thoughts. What did she want more?

* * *

"Hanna. We are not remodeling the dressing rooms."

"Ali! They are outdated! We can't sell the latest of fashions, and have our customers try them on in dingy cubicles. It's just highly unprofessional." Hanna countered.

"I know we have extra money right now, Han but we have to save." Ali insisted. "We do want to expand eventually, right?"

"I guess you're right. But I don't like it." Hanna conceded. "So, Emily tells me you got super wasted after Zoe's party. Care to explain?" Alison inwardly cursed Hanna for being Emily's go to confidant.

"The baby thing."

"Really, Ali? The baby thing? Are you kidding me?" Hanna asked in disbelief. "When are you going to get over that?"

"I'm trying to! It's not that easy!" Alison defended. "It's a big decision to make."

"I know it is. But you've been with Emily forever! And it's what she wants."

"And I'm going to give her what she wants. Eventually."

"You better, Ali. I hate seeing her upset. She's my best friend." Hanna relented.

"Do you think I like making her upset? It kills me." Alison sighed. This conversation with Hanna confirmed that the decision she made to hide her infidelity was correct one. Hanna was ready to bite her head off because she disagreed with Emily. Imagine what she would do if she found out that she cheated on Emily. Alison shuddered at the thought.

"Han, did you get the rest of the fall collection from the storage room?" Ali asked trying to change the subject.

"Ali, I don't lift. Send one of our employees." Hanna said with a smirk. The blonde duo had just hired their first employee. She was a part time student at Hollis and she was the sweetest thing.

"Sabrinaaa!" Hanna called as she flipped through the latest issue of Cosmo. A few seconds later Sabrina approached her bosses. Hanna ordered the slightly younger girl around effortlessly the young girl complying obediently. Ali looked around her and smiled. Her life was perfect, why would she want to change it?

* * *

Emily sighed as she made her way up to her and Ali's shared apartment. She had just endured the longest day ever. She was so excited for class today. Her students were preparing for one of her favorite labs of the year. But unfortunately, this generation had spit out an even bigger load of idiots then her own era. Seriously, these kids couldn't even get through a lab walk through with acting like complete imbeciles. So she ultimately decided to push the lab back another week, therefore screwing up her whole syllabus. And to top it all off, at swim practice she got word that her anchor had got put on academic probation. So she had to go through the process of grooming someone to take her place, two weeks before the first meet. It was a disaster. And she hoped to God that Ali's day had been better, because she could not handle a moody woman tonight. She made her way into the apartment, cautiously looking for any signs of Ali. As she walked into the apartment, she was met with a sight that melted her heart. The lights were dimmed and there we candles lit all over the dining room table, Chinese take out was served on the table. Ali stood in a little black number, leaning on the table with a single red rose clasped in her hand.

"Aria called." Ali stated "She felt bad that she had to fail your swimmer. She asked me to make it up to you."

"So you're only being sweet because Aria called?" Emily teased.

"No, I just needed an excuse to spoil you. I realized that I haven't in awhile."

"Ali, two weeks ago you took me out?" Emily reminded her girlfriend as she finally made her way to the gorgeous blonde. Ali wrapped her arms around Emily's waist and pulled her close.

"I should be spoiling you everyday. That's what you deserve." Ali pulled the tanned girl even closer and planted a soft kiss on her lips. Emily smiled into the kiss and she realized the answer to her question from earlier in her day. Even though she wanted children, she really did, she realized that despite everything she would give up anything for Ali. Even her dream.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews blow me out of the water! Thanks again for the feedback. I appreciate it, I really do. Let me know what you think!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Reviews are amazing, as always. Thank you for the support. Don't hate me for the time jump, I promise it's crucial. **

* * *

Eight Weeks Later

What. The. Fuck. Ali was so miserable it was unreal. She was currently emptying the contents of her stomach into the toilet, cursing herself for volunteering to help out in Zoe's day care class.

* * *

_Two Weeks prior... _

_The five Liars sat inside the Grille on a Sunday afternoon, eagerly awaiting time with the whole group. It was very rare to find all of them at one place at the same time, unless it was a holiday or special occasion. So when they all learned that they would be free at the same time, they decided to take advantage of the situation. _

_"Look at us." Hanna beamed proudly, "Eating Lunch together like we're in high school again." Alison smirked from her seat. They were sitting in the exact same positions as they did in high school. Emily next to Alison while Aria and Hanna sat across from them. And Spencer sat at the head of the table like the royalty she aspired to be. _

_"Hanna, we eat together all the time." Aria reminded her softly. _

_"Yeah, but not all of us. Alone." Hanna responded. _

_"I'm glad we could do this. I miss you guys." Emily responded earning herself a sweet smile from the rest of the table. _

_"We miss you too, Em." Spencer replied as she laid a hand on the tanned girl's shoulder. "Too bad Ali has been hogging you." Spencer shot a glance at the blonde. _

_"I do not!" Alison shot back with mock offense. "You totally do!" Hanna shot back defending Spencer. "You're a professional Emily hog!" Alison had nothing to say to defend herself. The fact of the matter was, that she had been keeping her girlfriend to herself. Every time she was alone, her thoughts started to eat at her. The amount of paranoia she felt when she was not with Emily was unbelievable. She had a constant fear that her one night stand would seek out her girlfriend and spill her secret. Or that somehow her secret would be told to the brunette in the cruelest way. So, to ease her nerves whenever they both were free Alison kept herself glued to her girlfriend. So, yeah she was guilty of Emily hogging. But it was completely necessary. _

_"So, what?" Ali asked defensively. "I've been needy lately. I like keeping her to myself. You guys know that." _

_"Yes, Ali. You're possessive. But you have no reason to be jealous. We're not trying to steal her from you." Spencer added. _

_"Well. There was that one time, with Hanna." Alison added childishly. Emily raised her eyebrow at her girlfriend in disbelief. _

_"Ali. You and everyone else at this table know that Emily will forever be my girl crush. There's nothing you can do about it." Hanna added nonchalantly. Alison pouted. Hanna was right, Emily had always been extremely close to her blonde business partner. She was slightly jealous that she wasn't the only blonde in the swim coach's life. _

_"Whatever." Alison relented as she reached under the table and placed her hand firmly on Emily's thigh possessively. _

_"So, Aria is the morning sickness any better?" Emily asks desperately trying to change the subject. _

_"Unfortunately, no." Aria answered "And my cravings have started to get more intense." _

_"Like what?" Spencer asked genuinely curious. "At first, my sweet tooth was insane. I had to have some type of candy with me at all time. And after that sort of died down, I need to have beef. Like all the time. I think you're right, Em. This has to be a boy with all of the red meat I've consumed." _

_"I told you not to doubt the genie, Aria." Hanna chimed. Soon after, the waiter came by to take their orders. Emily went with the Caesar salad, Hanna ordered the Chinese chicken salad Spencer ordered her usual grilled cheese sandwich. Aria, true to her cravings ordered a double bacon cheeseburger, with a steak to take home for later. And Ali, to everyone's bewilderment ordered an egg salad sandwich with two hard boiled eggs on the side. _

_"Eggs? Again Ali?" Emily asked worriedly. _

_"That's weird, even for you." Spencer commented. _

_"I can't explain it." Alison replied. "It's all I've had an appetite for, lately." _

_"Gross..." Hanna trailed off, "Well I have a question. So, I was supposed to volunteer Monday, at Zoe's day care class, but I have an appointment with my dermatologist. I would reschedule it, but Dr. Seang is Vietnamese, so she takes a three month hiatus during this time. So can anyone fill in for me? Its only for about 40 minutes around noon on Monday?" _

_"I totally, would Han. But I've got a lunch meeting with the DA." Spencer apologized. _

_"Em, Aria?" _

_"We can't. We have a faculty meeting at lunch. We have one every two weeks." Aria said sadly. _

_"Well? Ali?" Hanna asked hopefully. _

_"I guess Sabrina could handle the store by herself for an hour. Sure, I'll do it." Ali agreed happily. She did love spending time with Zoe. _

* * *

And that is why Ali is currently groaning in pain at five am.

"Ali?" Emily called tiredly as she entered the bathroom. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, baby. You don't have be up for another hour. I'll be okay."

"You know I can't sleep without you." Emily admitted softly as she kneeled next to her girlfriend. "You're still throwing up?"

"I think I've got the flu." Alison says softly as she lays her head on Emily's lap.

"I'll make you an appointment for later this week, okay?" Emily says as she starts running her fingers through blonde hair.

"How about we stay home today?" Ali suggests. "We can cuddle and you can take care of me?"

"That sounds, really nice." Emily admits as she swoops down to kiss Alison on the forehead. "Let me go call the agency." Emily rose to her feet to retrieve her cell phone. Alison sighed as her girlfriend left the room. Damn, she loved her.

* * *

The ringing of her phone jolted her out of her sleep. Emily smiled as she saw the form of her sleeping girlfriend. She hated that she couldn't make her girlfriend feel better. She looked at the caller and smiled.

"Hello?" She asked sleepily.

"Em! How's Ali? All she texted me was 'sick'. How is that a good excuse to tell your boss?"

"Hanna. You're not her boss. You are partners. Equals." Emily clarified as she removed herself from the bed. She didn't want to wake Ali.

"Whatever. I make the majority of the executive decisions." Hanna replied nonchalantly. Emily rolled her eyes. Sometimes, Hanna was insane. But she loved her.

"So, what's wrong with Ali?" Hanna inquired.

"She thinks it's the flu. I made her an appointment for tomorrow."

"So she's missing work again? Her paycheck is seriously going to be docked."

"Hanna," Emily warned.

"Rawr. Easy there tiger. But its kinda weird Ali has the flu. Because usually when one kid gets sick, more than half them do."

"Really? That's odd."

"But, whatever. Ali was always prone to disease." Hanna snickered. "So Zoe has been extra whiny lately. Terrible twos have hit her hard. The only person I know she'll behave for is you."

"Hanna, Zoe is an angel. If you want a break, just ask." Emily countered.

"Touche. Fields, you know me too well."

"She can't stay over, because we have the appointment. But I'll take her to a movie and ice cream?" Emily suggested.

"I love you, Em." Hanna replied gratefully.

"Anytime, babe. I'll see you later."

Emily hung up her phone and retreated back to her room. As she settled back into bed, she felt Ali shift next to her.

"Who was that?" The blonde grumbled groggily.

"Hanna. I have a date with Zoe tonight."

"Aww. I wish I could go." Ali pouted.

"You need your rest." Emily sighed. "But, you've got me for a couple more hours? What do you suggest we do?"

Alison wiggled her eyebrows at her girlfriend. "I like the way you think."

* * *

"Hey, sugar!" Emily cooed as she knelt down to pick up Zoe.

"Aunty Emmy!" The mini blonde screeched as she hugged the brunette.

"You ready?" Emily asked the little blonde.

"No." She pouted. "Mama said I can't leave till I eat all my broccoli!"

"Zoe!" Emily heard Hanna call from the kitchen.

"C'mon Zo, we've got to listen to Mama."

Emily walked into the kitchen with Zoe on her hip.

"Zoe Marie Rivers. I told you that I could not leave the table unless you finished your broccoli. And you left the table, but your broccoli is still there. I shouldn't let you go with aunt Emily tonight." Hanna threatened in her 'parental tone'.

"No! Mama I'm sorry!" Zoe pleaded, "Look, I'll eat it all up right now!" The toddler scrambled from Emily's arms and into her booster seat and proceeded to scarf up her broccoli. "See, Mama! I eated it!"

"I don't know, Zoe." Hanna started. "Maybe you should stay in your room tonight, and digest your broccoli."

"Mama! Please no! I promise I'll eat all my vegetables for the rest of my life!" Zoe pleaded almost hysterical. Emily's heart melted at the sight of her god daughter.

"C'mon! Please Mama!" Emily added trying to help Zoe. Hanna rolled her eyes at Emily's antics. The brunette knew she was just playing tough Mom.

"Just this once, Zoe." Hanna relented. "But next time, your cute little butt will stay here."

"Thank you, Mama! I love you!"

"I love you too, baby. Go get your shoes and sweater." The little girl dashed from her spot at the table and scrambled upstairs. Hanna moved her way to the table and collected her daughters plate, bringing it to the sink.

"You raised such a sweetheart, Han." Emily complimented.

"I'm savoring her sweetness." Hanna confessed. "I'm gonna blink and she'll be seventeen talking back and calling me a bitch behind my back."

"She's growing up so fast. I remember her birth like it was yesterday." Emily smiled fondly at the memory.

"God, I don't miss being pregnant." Hanna chuckled. "I was so big! I shudder at the thought of how swollen my feet got." Emily laughed, as she heard baby steps running into the kitchen.

"Aunt Emmy! I'm ready!"

"Okay, sugar. Let's roll."

"Bye, Mama! We rollin!"

"Bye, baby." Hanna smiled as she watched Emily walk away with her daughter. Her best friend would be such a great Mom, and it killed her that she wasn't any closer to become one. However, if Emily wanted to practice parenthood she could definitely borrow her daughter.

* * *

Emily walked into her apartment. It was quiet and she was grateful. She loved spending time with Zoe, but the two year old had limitless energy. She went into the bedroom and looked for her girlfriend who was in the same position as when she left. She put her hand on her forehead. It wasn't warm, but there had to be something wrong if she could sleep soundly through the day.

"How was Zoe?" A hoarse voice asked.

"She was great. How are you feeling?" Emily asked concerned.

"I'm just tired. Like I feel utterly exhausted. But I know I'll feel better when you're next to me." Alison smiled, patting the bed next to her. Emily climbed into the bed and settled in next to her girlfriend. Alison sighed as she snuggled into Emily's side. She hoped her sickness would be quick fix, she wanted to go back to the way things were before she started her insane puking. Her relationship was the best it has been in awhile. They paid special attention to each other, spilled intimate secrets and made love like they did in the honeymoon stage of their relationship. It was an amazing two months, even though the reasoning behind it was less than amazing. But she would power through it, and keep making Emily happy, the best way she knew how.

* * *

Emily and Alison patiently waited in the waiting room. They had been waiting a little over ten minutes and Alison was getting quite fidgety. She didn't like doctors offices, especially after that well check she had to endure with Hanna all those years ago. Emily noticed her anxious girlfriend and grabbed her and.

"Ali, its just a check up. It'll be fine."

"I know, babe. I just don't like places like this." Alison sighed as she turned to face Emily. She turned and faced Emily and smiled at the brunette. She leaned in and gave her a soft kiss.

"I love you."

"I love you, too." Emily replied earnestly. Just then Ali's name was called and the two of them were lead to the examination room. As they entered the room, Ali took a seat on the exam table and Emily took a seat against the wall. The doctor entered shortly after, and Ali sucked in her breath.

"Good morning, ladies I'm Dr. Stevens and I'll be examining you today. So, Alison Dilaurentis aged 27. Complains of extreme fatigue and excessive vomiting. Any other symptoms?"

"I get waves of nausea sometimes." Ali admitted shyly.

"Is there any chance that you may be pregnant?" Alison's eyes shot up immediately. Cursing herself for not considering that. Emily chuckled from her spot against the wall.

"No, ma'am that's not an option. We've been in a committed relationship for five years." Emily answered for her girlfriend.

"So that's a no?" The doctor asked a little bewildered.

"That's scientifically not possible, Doc." Ali replied shooting a reassuring smile at Emily. The doctor continued to ask Alison mundane questions which the blonde answered easily. Finally, the doctor concluded that they would need to do some blood work, to determine a proper diagnosis. The doctor exited claiming a nurse would be in soon to draw blood. When the nurse came in to extract the blood Alison immediately went rigid. She extended her hand out, but the brunette didn't notice she was too busy tinkering with her phone.

"Babe?" Alison call needing the comfort of her girl. Emily looked up and smiled she went over to the girl, quickly clasping their hands together. The nurse professionally took the blood and Emily rewarded Ali with a quick kiss for being a good patient.

"Okay, Ms. Dilaurentis your test results should be back sometime this afternoon, since today is Saturday. So I'll have Dr. Steven's receptionist call you with the results. Do you have anymore questions?" the nurse asked politely. Alison declined politely and walked out of the exam room with Emily.

"I've got to go to the store for a bit." Ali sighed as she got into the car. "Hanna feels like she's being neglected." Emily chuckled, "That's fine. I'm meeting with Spencer and Aria for coffee and we're going to help Spencer shop for her new house." Spencer and Toby had recently decided that they wanted to look for a home that they could raised their family in. They found a nice place close to where Spencer grew up, but it was a slight fixer-upper. Spencer had just wanted to go the easy route and hire a contractor, but Toby having the carpenter blood running through his veins insisted that he did all of the repair work himself.

"I'll call, Aria. Tell her to pick up me up at the shop." Emily scooped up her phone before sliding into the passenger seat after Ali declared herself okay to drive. When she pulled up to the boutique. Aria's car was parked out front, so they assumed she was inside visiting with Hanna.

"My sweet, Alison." Hanna drawled in a faux southern voice. "Please tell me you're on medical leave so I can take complete control of this place!"

"Har-har, Han. I'm here to prevent that from happening." Alison replied smoothly.

"Alright, Em. Spencer is going to call in about two minutes because she hates when we're late." Aria suggested as she made her way towards the exit. Emily bid both of the blondes goodbye, giving Alison a quick kiss before she followed the shorter brunette out the door.

* * *

"Spence, I really don't see the difference." Aria sighed annoyed at the persistent lawyer in front of her. Spencer currently had the two high school teachers in her new house forcing them to choose what color paint looked better on the living room walls. They were currently choosing between dark maroon and slightly less dark maroon.

"Aria, that one is shiner." Emily commented

"They are both equally as shiny!" Spencer snapped. "We are going for tone here, people!"

"Spence, we selected and ordered all of the furniture for the house. Inside and outside. I think we can save paint for another day." Aria reasoned.

"You're right. Plus, I think Alison and Hanna might be better at this than you guys." Spencer teased. As the threesome made their way back to Aria's car, a patrol car pulled up to the residence and a big smile etched on Spencer's face.

"Hey, baby." Toby greeted as he quickly kissed his wife. "Aria, Em."

"Hey, Toby." They girls replied simultaneously

"This is my partner, Marcus Woodson. You guys have met before." Toby introduced.

"Good evening, ladies." Officer Woodson greeted. The girls nodded politely. "So are a couple of you are missing. Where's, um Alison? The blonde, right?" Emily was quite taken back that the officer renumbered her girlfriends name in particularly. The last time they had run into each other was at the Christmas party Spencer's parents had threw. But that was a while ago.

"She's, uh doing alright." Emily began. "Nothing unusual."

"Well, that's great to hear. Hey, Tobs let's get a look at the deck you were telling me about." And with that, the two officers made their way towards Spencer and Toby's new home.

* * *

"Ali?" Emily called as she stepped into the apartment wondering where her girlfriend was.

"I'm in the shower!" Ali called back. "I didn't make dinner so I was thinking, maybe a pizza?"

"Fine with me." Emily replied. Just then Ali's phone started buzzing from its place on the kitchen table. "Ali! Your phone. Its Dr. Stevens office."

"Answer it! I'll be right out!" The blonde called. She was glad the doctor was finally calling. She was so over puking up her guts.

"Hello?"

"Hello, this is Stephanie calling with the test results from Alison Dilaurentis' blood tests conducted this morning."

"Yeah, she's in the shower. I'm her girlfriend I can tell her the results." Emily confirmed.

"Well Alison's blood work came back relatively normal. Except she had a high concentration of the hCG hormone. Which means-"

"Oh, my God." The brunette cut of the nurse. She was a science teacher. She knew what having hCG in your system meant. She just didn't want to believe it. "You don't mean that-"

"Yes, Ms. You're girlfriend is pregnant."

* * *

**A/N: I know I hate myself too. The story is really going to pick up after this. Thanks for the reviews and the continuous support. I'll update as soon as I can. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello, lovely people. Thank you for the reviews! They make my heart happy. Warning: there shall be angst. **

* * *

"You've reached Emily Fields, I'm sorry I missed your call. But I promise I'll return it as soon as I can!" Beeeep.

Alison sighed as she hung up her phone for the thousandth time. She had no reason to be depressed. This pain was self inflicted. But, she couldn't help calling Emily's phone just to hear her voice for ten seconds. She was torturing herself, but it was the sweetest kind of pain. Alison tossed her phone to the side. She had never felt as terrible as she did at this current moment. She wanted Emily, no she needed her but she knew it would probably be awhile before she was face to face with the raven haired beauty. She had really screwed up this time. Alison picked up her phone and began to scroll through pictures of Emily, she began to daydream about the girl when she was interrupted by obnoxious knocking at her door.

"Alison! Open up!" She heard Spencer yell through the door. "We know you're in there!"

"Go away!" She yelled back. She didn't want her self loathing party to be interrupted.

"Alison. We're worried about you." She heard Aria's soft voice call through the door. "We haven't heard from you in almost a week. And Emily is so upset she's not speaking to anybody but Zoe."

"Come on, Ali." Spencer sighed "We just want an explanation."

Suddenly, there was the unmistakable sound of a key entering a lock. A few seconds later, Spencer and Aria came barreling through the door. Ali lay sprawled on the couch phone clutched to her chest. The Notebook was playing softly in the background and the entire apartment smelt like eggs.

"Ali. Please talk to us." Aria cooed. "We know something happened. Just fill us in so we can figure out how to help."

"Hanna says you haven't been to work in a week. What's going on?"

"I can't face Hanna, I know she hates me." Ali confessed.

"You must've done something bad." Spencer commented. She knew Hanna was fiercely protective of Emily and if Hanna hated her something terrible happened.

"Start with happened last week. Why did Emily leave?" Aria prompted. Last week. God, that night was the worst night of her life. However, she couldn't help replaying the scene over and over again.

"I had just gotten out of the shower.."

* * *

_Alison stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her midsection. That shower had felt amazing, and now all she wanted to do was eat some pizza, cuddle up with her girl and watch tonight's episode of Scandal. She dressed leisurely and made her way out to the kitchen. Maybe a fried egg would taste good on pepperoni. Yeah she was going to try that. As she entered the kitchen she was met with a sight that she hadn't witnessed in almost ten years. Emily was sitting at the table eyes, cold and hard. Her brown orbs were distant, staring at the wall clearly deep in thought. She didn't even realize that Alison had entered the room. Ali had only seen this look in her eyes once before, when Emily "broke up" with her after she "identified" Cyrus. But this time, her stare was much more intense than it had been back then. And that thought alone scared the crap out of her. _

_"Em?" She called tentatively. Emily looked up and glanced at Alison for about two seconds. The lack of emotion set a chill down her spine. _

_"The doctor called," Emily began. "But I think they made a mistake. They must've had an accident in the lab, or mixed up the results. Because there is no way in hell my girlfriend could be pregnant." _

_Alison's heart dropped straight to her stomach. Pregnant. Medically, it explained everything perfectly. Her fatigue, nausea and the unexplainable cravings for eggs. But she was on the pill. Even though she was in a monogamous relationship with a woman, she didn't like dealing with the hassles of periods. Emily didn't either. So they were both on birth control. Even though birth control wasn't 100% effective, it shouldn't have been that easy to get pregnant. _

_"But?" Ali began. She couldn't put her thoughts into words: I cheated but I shouldn't be pregnant. _

_"The birth control?" Emily asked "Yeah. I thought the same thing. But don't you remember when you stepped on the nail inside of the storage room in the shop a couple of months ago? Antibiotics interfere with birth control." _

_The look on Alison's face gave away her guilt almost instantly. Her face contorted painfully, and tears started to fall uncontrollably. _

_"Who was it?" Emily asked voice, barely a whisper. "Anyone I know? Was it Noel? Or since you like cheaters was it Zack? Or Byron?" Emily was getting cruel and that was definitely not a good sign. _

_"Who was it Ali!" Emily's voice raising. "You at least owe me this." _

_"Emily, please." Ali pleaded. "Let me explain, please." _

_"Just tell me." _

_"It was Toby's partner, Marcus." _

_"Him? We barely know him! Why? Why did you do this Ali? What made you want to hurt me so badly?" Emily was in tears now openly crying. "I thought we were happy." _

_"We were." Alison insisted. "We are. That night I was so frustrated and drunk. It didn't mean anything. You have to believe me." _

_"I sat there, like an idiot and had a conversation with that guy not even an hour ago. Not knowing the whole entire time, he had knocked up my girlfriend!?" Emily shouted. _

_"I am so sorry. And I love you. You have to believe that." Alison pleaded. _

_"Why should I? I have no reason to believe you. That night. The night you cheated. Was it the night of Zoe's birthday?" Emily asked distraught. _

_"Emily, please." _

_"Answer me!" _

_"Yes." _

_"You left, because we were fighting about a baby. The very next day, you promised that we'd have a baby. You said all of these things to me. You made all of these promises. And now they don't mean anything." Emily put her head in her hands and sobbed. Alison stood across from her girlfriend equally as upset. She mumbled apologies and declarations of love but they went unheard by the brunette. _

_"I was willing to give up everything for you." Emily confessed voice harder, and colder than it had ever been. "I was willing to give up everything! Having a baby, being a Mom. Everything!" _

_"Emily, please." Alison begged. "I didn't mean to hurt you." _

_"But you did. Like you always have done. But guess what. I'm not giving you the power to hurt me anymore. Not now. Not ever again." Emily furiously wiped the tears from her eyes. She grabbed her phone and her keys and made her way towards the door. This made Alison even more desperate. She lunged for the tan girl's arm. She grasped onto it and tugged the girl back. _

_"Don't leave, Emily. Please. I love you more than life itself. I can't lose you. I just can't lose you. I can't." Alison begged. She couldn't lose Emily. Emily was her life. _

_"Ali, believe it or not but you lost me they day you slept with him. You just didn't realize it yet." _

_And with those words, she was gone. _

* * *

"I, I haven't spoken to her since. I tried calling, but her phone is off." Ali finished her cheeks wet with tears.

"Well, do you blame her, Ali?" Spencer spat. She was almost as fiercely protective of Emily as Hanna was. "I can't believe you, Alison! After everything you two have been through."

"I know, Spencer. You don't understand how I'm feeling! I feel as if I clawed my own heart out. I really messed up and I don't know how to fix it." Alison tried to explain.

"I don't know if you can." Aria replied honestly. "Look, Ali. I'm not going to bullshit you. I am totally not on your side. And the fact that you slept with my husband's partner? It just amazes me how you can do something so selfishly and end up hurting so many in the aftermath." Spencer looked at Alison with a single tear in her eye. "I'll be in the car, Aria." The lawyer left the apartment with the dramatic door slam. Alison sighed. Great. Having Spencer and Hanna against her is not going to be fun.

"Alison." Aria spoke up for the first time. "You need to make it right with Emily." Alison nodded. Of course she needed to. "But, you need to start taking care of yourself too. You've got a baby on the way, you need to consider its well being."

"I don't want this baby, Aria. This baby caused me to lose the love of my life. Do you think I want a reminder for the rest of my life of how I messed up the best thing to ever happen to me? No thank you." Alison huffed. She had made up her mind to terminate her pregnancy almost instantly after Emily left. She couldn't win Emily back with a baby on her hip.

"Ali.. Terminating this baby won't solve any of your problems." Aria reminded. "Emily won't magically come back."

"I know." Alison agreed painfully. "But I've made my decision. And you can't change my mind."

Aria sighed. Abortion was a terrible answer, despite the circumstances.

"Ali, just think about it? Okay? Before you make any rash decisions, think it over." Aria reasoned. "Okay, fine." Alison relented. Aria gave her a sad smile before turning to leave. "Aria! Wait." Alison rose to her feet and approached her shorter friend. "How's Emily?"

"Not good." Aria sighed as she rubbed her temple. "She took a week off of work, claiming her grandmother died, but we all attended that funeral in eighth grade. Hanna says she's barely eating, Zoe manages to coax a granola bar or two down a day. And she-." Aria quickly stopped. Realizing Emily probably wouldn't want Alison to know those things.

"She's what?" Ali asked impatiently. She was hanging on to Aria's words like a lifeline. She needed to know more.

"She's broken, Ali. You broke her." Aria says voice hard. "You can't keep doing this. You can't keep hurting people, and expect them to forgive you."

"I know." Alison grunts frustrated. Did they really think that she didn't know how destructive she was? She knew. And she absolutely hated it.

"You don't!" Aria exclaimed. "Especially with Emily."

"What are you saying?" Alison shot back defensively.

"You might love her, Ali. I don't doubt that you do. But when are you going to realize that maybe you're not the best for her?" Aria's voice quivered as she ended her sentence. "Spencer's waiting." She quickly excused herself and Alison was once again left alone with her thoughts. She couldn't accept that maybe she wasn't good for Emily. She didn't want to even think about it. But deep in the depths of her brain, she knew. Emily could do so much better than her, she just couldn't possibly let go.

* * *

"Emily." Hanna called softly as she knocked lightly on her guest room door. "Em, you need to eat something more than granola. I have grilled cheese?"

Suddenly the door swung open to reveal her two year old daughter one, hand on her hip as she relayed her aunt's message.

"She said no thank you, Mama."

"Well can we at least talk?" Hanna offered.

Zoe closed the door and her little feet scurried over to where Emily lay on the bed. She could hear whispering from the other side, but she couldn't decipher what they were saying. She heard little feet come running back.

"She doesn't wanna talk to anyone, Mama."

"She's talking to you." Hanna countered.

"It's cause I'm special." Zoe declared. The toddler shut the door and scurried back onto the bed with her favorite aunt. The tiny blonde resumed their movie on her iPad mini, while simultaneously resting her hand inside of Emily's. Emily smiled despite her terrible mood. Zoe was such a sweetheart, being with her made her feel the slightest bit better. Ten minutes pass before Caleb comes through the door with Hanna in tow.

"C'mon, Zoe. Me and you are going on a little dinner date." Caleb propositions as he moves towards the bed.

"Maybe later, Daddy. Aunt Emmy needs me." The two year old stated firmly.

"I know she does, sweetheart. But Mama wants time with Emily and I need my Zoe time."

"Sorry. Daddy, but I can't."

"Alright. We're going to have to do this the hard way." Caleb walked over to the bed and easily scooped Zoe up. He started to exit the room while the toddler protested.

"Daddy, no! Somebody hurt aunt Emily's feelings, and she's sad! Daddy they need to go to timeout!" Zoe cried as the duo left the house. Hanna made her way to the bed and sat next to her best friend. She was going to kill Alison, even though she didn't know exactly what happened, she knew that the blonde had broken her friend's heart.

"Em, please talk to me." Hanna cooed as she ran her fingers through the sullen girl's hair. "The only reason I made it through the thousand breakups with Caleb, was because of you. Let me do the same for you, please." The two sat in silence for a few more minutes until Emily spoke for the first time.

"It hurts, Han."

"I know, Em. I do." Hanna spoke softly. "Just let it all out." Hanna heard her best friend choke back a sob before her emotions took control. Emily started to cry hysterically, her mantra of "it hurts" continuously pouring from her lips. Hanna pulled the girl to her chest and held her as she cried. Whispering soothing words and continuing to stroke her hair. After about thirty minutes in this state, Emily's cries died down to whimpers and Hanna held onto her tighter.

"Tell me what happened, Em."

And she did. She told Hanna everything, from the call to leaving. She told her how Alison was pregnant, how she had slept with Toby's partner. She told her how betrayed she felt and how she didn't think she could get over Alison.

"I'm gonna kill her."

"Hanna," Emily warned

"No. I'm literally going to strangle her."

"You can't go down for double homicide, Han"

"I just thought she changed." Hanna said somberly.

"Me too, Han." Emily agreed. After a few more minutes of silence Emily spoke up again.

"And the worst part is, after everything she did I should hate her. And I do, but there's a part of me, deep down that still loves her. I still love her, after everything. And I hate that. I absolutely do." Emily finished wiping away a stray tear.

"That's normal, Em." Hanna replied "You can't

just turn off love. It's a fresh wound. Time will help you sort all of your feelings out." Emily nodded. Hanna was right, she just needed time.

"But, right now what you need is wine. I've got two bottles of Merlot with our names on it." Emily rolled her eyes at Hanna, alcohol was always the answer. But, she had to admit getting drunk sounded pretty great. "But you have to eat your cheese sandwich first, missy. You're not getting alcohol poisoning on my watch." Hanna joked as she started to leave the bed. She handed Emily the cold grilled cheese before she leaned down and kissed her on the forehead.

"I love you, Em. And I'm going to help you through this." Hanna told her sincerely.

"I know you will, Han. And I love you too." Emily replied back with a smile. Hanna returned the smile, and scampered off to retrieve the wine. But will she get over her? Did she want to? No, she truthfully decided. She didn't want to get over Alison Dilaurentis, but she needed to. She had to.

* * *

After a weekend of drinking wine and binge movie watching with Hanna and her mini me, Emily finally decided to put on her big girl pants and return to work. As she walked up to her classroom on Monday morning, she was met with a sight that warmed her heart. Aria waited with two coffees, and a bag of pastries from her favorite bakery downtown. Under her arm a plastic container of her famous walnut brownies.

"Aria, you didn't have to." Emily stated as she unlocked the door.

"I wanted to, Em. I've missed you this passed week." Aria replied honestly.

"I missed you, too. I just needed some space."

"I know, Em. I don't blame you." Aria agreed as she set the goodies down on Emily's desk. She situated herself before going into her purse and pulling out a cheeseburger from a fast food chain.

"Hanna tell you?" Emily answered amusingly as she bit into her bagel.

"No. Actually, Alison told me everything. Me and Spencer went to check on her Friday. She looked terrible."

"Well.." Emily trailed off not knowing what to say.

"I'm just worried about her. I know she broke your heart, but Emily she's going a tad bit insane." Aria commented, concerned.

"She's not really my problem anymore, Aria."

"I know. Believe me, I do. Its just, she wants to get an abortion and that's just not sitting well with me." Aria confessed. An abortion? Alison was really going to kill her own offspring? It confused her, the Alison that she knew did not support "easy fix" abortions.

"I agree," Emily started "abortion is not the answer. But what do you want me to do about it?"

"Talk to her, maybe?" Aria suggested. "I know you're mad, but you'd be talking her out of doing something that she'd regret."

"I don't know, Aria."

"Just think about it, please?"

"Will do." Emily smiled at her pregnant friend. Aria smiled back, and then launched into a story about how the last staff meeting they had. The two friends easily fell back into her morning routine, while Emily tried to ignore the ominous feeling growing in the pit of her stomach.

* * *

Emily sighed as she walked up the front steps of 'Kinder Care' the daycare center which her niece attended. Hanna did not feel the least bit guilty using her extra house guest as a third parent. With Caleb visiting his dad for the week, Emily was taking on the role of second parent. Emily was to pick Zoe up, and take her to dance class. Usually, Emily didn't mind spending extra time with her niece, but she had just given her kids a mid term, and she had a feeling that they had failed it. She walked up to the front desk and asked where to find her niece. She walked into classroom 2D and her ears immediately perk up when she hears a high pitched squeal.

"Aunty Em!"

"Hey, Sugar!" Emily greeted the toddler with a kiss. "Go get your things." The toddler rushed to her cubby. As Emily waited, she was approached by a slim brunette with cute thick rimmed glasses.

"So, you're the famous Aunt Emily?" The unknown girl asked.

"Guilty." Emily confessed. "I'm sorry, how do you know my name."

"I'm Stephanie Clarke, Zoe's day care teacher." She introduced herself. "You see, every Monday the kids go around the room and recount what they did during the weekend. And for the past two weeks, Zoe's story has been the same."

"Which was?" Emily asked slightly embarrassed.

"Taking care of Aunt Emily, because Aunt Ali hurt her feelings." The teacher replied smugly.

"Oh, lord." Emily replied embarrassed.

"Don't be embarrassed. I think its sweet." Miss Clarke replied. "But you've got to tell her to stop asking me to put Aunt Ali in time out." Emily laughed. She loved how Zoe was so protective of her, it was adorable. "I mean, I don't know how to explain that I cannot put another adult into time out." The teacher laughed.

"Miss Stephanie! Robbie hit me!"

"She hit me first."

The young teacher smiled ruefully. "Well, duty calls. I hope to see you again soon, aunt Emily." The teacher walked off to tend to her class. Was she flirting with her? No, she was just being nice. Was she? Thankfully, Zoe interrupted her thoughts, grabbed her hand and led her to the car. Maybe picking up Zoe wasn't going to be such a chore after all?

8

Alison groaned as she made her way towards her beloved boutique. She hadn't been inside of the store, for almost two weeks. She tried to avoid the place for as long as she could, but she had received an incrementing text from Hanna this morning.

I_ know you killed your relationship, but do you really want to kill your business, too? _

God, dealing with Hanna was going to be terrible. But she pushed through, she needed to be an adult and put her personal emotions aside and focus on her career. She entered the shop to find it was a complete mess. The clothes were unorganized, half old merchandise half new. She could hear Hanna's voice ringing throughout the store. She was clearly frustrated and Alison didn't blame her. They had just got a new shipment of merchandise, they had to be recorded by pin number for inventory, while getting priced and set out for sale. It was a lot of work for just two people. And now that classes have started back up at Hollis, Sabrina was working less hours. So basically Hanna was handling the business almost by herself.

"Hanna?" Alison called. Hanna turned around. She was on the phone she held up her finger indicating that she needed a moment. She quickly ended her call and turned to face the other blonde.

"Look, I know you're going through shit. I get it, I'm in the process of cleaning up one of your messes." Hanna finished obviously hinting at her failed relationship.

"I don't really care what you mess up in your personal life. But here? This is our business. This place supports my family. And you can't just put in jeopardy because you're having a bad day."

"I'm sorry, Han. It won't happen again." Ali apologized sincerely. Hanna eyed her up and down suspiciously. She still didn't trust her, but she had to deal with her.

"So here are the ground rules. We don't converse unless its about something related to the business. And you may absolutely not, under any circumstances ask me about Emily." Hanna finished with a stern look.

"O-okay." Alison agreed. She had no choice but to agree.

"Well, we've got to record the rest of this shipment and do inventory. So we'll be here until pretty late tonight. I've got to call Emily and tell her to feed Zoe." Hanna stated as she pulled out her phone.

"Hanna, I'm sorry. I can't stay late too late. I have an appointment at the clinic at 5:30."

"The clinic? What for?" Hanna asked genuinely confused.

"I- I'm uhm getting an abortion." Alison replied softly. Hanna's eyes grew wide momentarily, as she processed her business partners confession. She was about to comment on her friend's poor decision, when she realized that she had just put an end to personal conversation with their relationship. So she nodded and continued to take inventory. Alison wanted to have Hanna's opinion on her pregnancy so badly, but based on her friend's reaction she realized that she didn't care. No one cared anymore, well maybe Aria did. But the rest, Hanna, Spencer and Emily didn't. And it was all because of this baby. She was going to terminate this pregnancy, and hopefully her life would regain some of it's normalcy.

* * *

Alison sat in her car. She was going to do this. She had to. This baby ruined her life. She was convinced that this was the right thing to do, but somehow it seemed so wrong? But, she had made her decision and she was going to follow through with it. She slowly made her way to the door, she was about to step inside when she heard the most beautiful voice call out her name.

"Alison!"

Her head whipped around so quickly, she swore she had whiplash. But she couldn't help it, walking towards her was the most beautiful creature ever to walk the planet. Her heart jumped wildly in her chest, at the first time of seeing the beauty in a week.

"Emily," Alison breathed out softly. Was Emily coming to stop her from doing this? Was she coming to reconcile? Her heart soared with hope as the brunette approached her.

"Don't kill your baby." Emily stated bluntly.

"Um. Okay?" Alison started, unsure how to proceed with the conversation.

"I mean it. Don't do it. Its not this baby's fault that it was convinced. And I didn't leave because of it." Alison winced as Emily brought up their relationship."Don't do it, Alison. You'll only regret it."

"Emily, I don't want a physical reminder of the worst mistake I've ever made. It's just too much." Alison confessed, tears beginning to swell up in her eyes.

"Ultimately, it's your decision." Emily decided. "I just don't think you should do it." Alison smiled at the girl. At least she cared enough to not let her make a terrible decision.

"Okay, you're right. You're right Em. Its not this baby's fault. You're right. Its my fault. And I'm so incredibly sorry, I am. You hav-"

"Alison!" Emily cut her off. "I'm not here to talk about this. I just. I just needed to tell you not to do it. I talked to Aria and um, I'd feel guilty if you went through with it and I didn't try to save an innocent life." They stared at each other in awkward silence for a few minutes before Emily excused herself, claiming she had midterms to grade. As Alison made her way home, the reality finally set it: she was going to be a mother, and that scared the crap out of her.

* * *

**A/N: I know some of you have had abortion/ why didn't Alison think she was pregnant questions. I hope they were answered. Reviews make my day! **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hey, there lovelies. I can't help but want to keep writing after I read your reviews. You have no idea how happy they make me. **

* * *

"Okay, guys your lab analysis is due first thing Monday." Emily lectured her class as the packed up, the hour coming to a close. "Especially, you Torres. That dog ate my homework excuse is literally 50 years old."

"Ms. Fields you know you love me." The sixteen year old boy flirted.

"Yeah, about as much as noble gases like reacting with other elements." Emily joked as the whole class went silent.

"Really? Have I taught you nothing?" Emily was again met with silence. Just as she was about to scold her students the bell rang, saving them from a lecture. Emily sighed as she started erasing the lesson of the day. This year's class was having an extremely hard time grasping the material. Sometimes she felt that her own personal issues were preventing her from teaching these kids properly. But her doubt was washed away when Aria admitted she was experiencing the same problem. Speaking of Aria, she was supposed to be meeting her for lunch soon. She finished cleaning the board and grabbed her lunch and phone and made her way towards Aria's classroom. She entered quietly and sat herself down on one of the desks. Aria was currently discussing a grade that she had given.

"Mrs. Fitz, I cited my sources! You cannot give me an F!" The student argued.

"You cannot copy and paste someone's entire essay and merely give them credit for it at the end. You put none of your own opinions or analysis in 'your' paper. So, the grade stands."

"That's so unfair! You never said we couldn't do it."

"I wrongfully thought students your age possess common sense. Now, go. Before I get you suspended for plagiarism." Aria dismissed the cheating student. The student rolled his eyes and left with a huff, clearly annoyed with his teacher.

"Kids these days think I'm stupid. Me? I can't believe it." Aria sighed.

"No kidding. My 3rd period class couldn't even come up with any answers that sounded remotely scientific." Emily sighed as she took a sip of water.

"Why did we become teachers?" Aria groaned as she started the cut into a ribeye steak.

"We wanted to help mold the leaders of tomorrow." Emily scoffed. "How did you get that?"

"I sent my Teacher's Assistant."

"Wow. My TA is totally lazy. She grades like 10 papers in an hour." Emily complained.

"I love Leslie. Sometimes, I feel like I take advantage of her, but whatever. I'm 5 and a half months pregnant." Aria laughed.

"You're halfway, done with your pregnancy. How are you feeling?"

"I'm getting pretty anxious. I'm constantly gaining weight and my tiny frame does not appreciate it." Aria answered honestly. "How have you been holding up?" Emily knew what Aria was referring to, but it didn't make her want to answer the question. It had been a little over a month since she'd last spoken to Alison in the parking lot of the clinic. Its not like she didn't miss her, she did insanely. But sometime over the past week, she had stopped imagining that every blonde she passed on the street was Alison. And yeah, she missed rolling over and having a warm body pressed into hers. But when she randomly woke in the middle of the night, her heart didn't race in panic wondering where the blonde was. The pain was still there, Alison still held a vice like grip on her heart. But, slowly everyday the grip loosened ever so slightly.

"I'm better." She admitted. "It doesn't hurt as much as it did in the beginning."

"That's great, Em. It really is." Aria smiled, relieved that her friend was doing better. "So, are you going to Spencer's party Saturday?" Emily shook her head in disbelief. Spencer with her dramatics. It was her and Toby's three year anniversary so she decided to throw a "mini banquet" whatever that meant. If she was going through all if this trouble for her three year anniversary, what the heck was she going to do after ten years. Or twenty. Emily did not want to even think about it.

"Of course, I'll be there."

"What if Ali's there?" Aria asked softly.

Emily hadn't thought about that possibility. What if Ali was there? Would she be able to stand it?

"I mean, I'm not going to walk up and have a heartfelt conversation with her. But I'm not going to engage in a screaming match with her either." Emily confessed.

"That makes sense. At least you won't have to deal with Toby's partner." Aria added.

"Thank God."

Ali, she could handle. She had many years of practice avoiding her feelings towards that girl. But what kind of man sleeps with a girl who was obviously in a committed relationship? And to top it all off, he had another pregnant woman waiting at home for him? She just didn't get it.

"So, any baby names on the table?" Emily asked genuinely curious. As Aria went on about names from Joshua to Jacklyn, Emily wondered if she would ever be able to have a civil conversation with Alison. Because she still has somethings to get off of her chest. And she was sure Alison did too.

* * *

Alison groaned as she slipped on a pair of Emily's baggy workout sweats. She knew that with pregnancy came weight gain, but she didn't know it would happen this quickly. She was 15 weeks pregnant and she already felt like she gained 100 pounds. When in reality, she had only gained eight pounds. But those eight pounds had caused all of her clothes to feel tight and uncomfortable. So she wore some of Emily's athletic clothes that Hanna had left behind. The blonde came over to the apartment to collect the majority of Emily's clothes two weeks prior, and that had nearly destroyed her. She missed Emily like crazy, and combining how out of whack her hormones had been lately she was a mess. She broke down in the grocery store because she had gone down the cereal aisle and not picked up any Honey Nut Cheerios for Emily. She was going insane, but she knew Emily was getting better. She had noticed her around town a handful of times, and she didn't look as battered and broken as she did in the kitchen all those weeks ago. She looked almost normal, and that scared Alison more than anything. If Emily was feeling normal again, that would mean she was getting over her. Alison knew that if Emily got completely over her, she would have to watch the love of her life move on with someone who wasn't her. And she didn't know if she was strong enough to see that happen. Even though she hated the look of sweat pants, she couldn't help but feel a little closer to Emily. Alison sighed as she ran her hands down the material of the pants. She could remember vividly the last time Emily wore these pants.

* * *

_It was a Sunday afternoon right before everything went downhill. Emily had grown restless from being cooped up in the apartment all day. She had wanted to go on a run, but Alison had advised her not to, because the weather man had warned that there would be a thunderstorm. But, Emily did what she wanted to and against Ali's wishes she took off into the awaiting storm. Not long after Emily took off, the soft patter of rain fall began to fill Alison's ears. She was worried about the brunette, if she stayed out too long she would catch pneumonia. To busy herself during Emily's absence, Ali started to tidy up the apartment. As she was about to unload the dishwasher, she heard a distinct yelling come from outside. She walked outside to see her girlfriend, in the pouring rain spinning around laughing like a two year old. _

_"You're going to get sick!" Ali called from her spot in the doorway. "You're insane!" _

_"Come be insane with me!" Emily invited as she lifted her head up to the sky and opened her mouth. She was probably going to get sick, but life is about moments and this wasn't a moment to pass up. "C'mon!" Emily called once again as she continued to spin. The old Alison Dilaurentis wouldn't even consider prancing around in the rain like an idiot, but she wasn't the old Alison. She was Emily's Alison, and she was going to act silly with her girl in the rain. She ran out to meet Emily, giggling like crazy. Emily wrapped her arms around Alison's shoulders and pulled her close. _

_"You're freezing." Alison declared softly. _

_"Mhm. Warm me up?" Emily suggested._

_Alison let out a hearty laugh before firmly gripping Emily's cheeks and planting a kiss on her lips. Sure, they were going to get pneumonia, but it was so worth it. _

* * *

Alison wiped a tear from her cheek as she recalled the memory. She would give anything to have another afternoon like that with Emily. She missed her terribly, she needed to find a way to communicate with her. And soon.

* * *

Emily pulled up to Zoe's day care center and looked into her compact mirror to fix her lip gloss. She had been volunteering to pick up the toddler on a regular basis. She claimed that it was the least she could do,

since she was living at the Rivers' manor rent free. She walked towards room 2D with a slight sway in her step. Of course she was not the slightest bit over Alison, and she was definitely not looking for a relationship. But, a little extra attention from the pretty teacher could do no harm. She opened the door slowly and was immediately greeted by her god daughter. She smiled sweetly at her, before urging her to retrieve her things. Just as she expected, Miss Stephanie Clarke came walking towards her.

"Aunt Emily." The teacher greeted jokingly

"Are you ever going to stop calling me that?"

"Probably not, Aunt Emily. It suits you."

"Fine." Emily huffed, "Then I shall call you teacher Stephanie until you stop." The teacher laughed at the tan woman.

"Okay, you win. Every teacher hates being called "teacher."

"Tell me about it." Emily agreed.

"You teach?" Stephanie asked amused.

"I teach chemistry at the high school." Emily explained. "But my student teaching was done in a first grade classroom. I went by teacher Emily all year."

"Well I have a newfound respect for you, Miss Chemistry teacher." Miss Clarke flirted. Just then Zoe came back from her cubby and insisted that they hurry.

"Until next time, Miss Clarke." The day care teacher smiled sweetly back and turned her attention to her class.

She was definitely picking up Zoe tomorrow.

* * *

Emily sat on her bed in the guest bedroom of the Marin-Rivers household. She was sipping green tea while trying to sort through the homework she collected today. She was currently writing a slightly condescending comment on a student's work when her phone blared from the spot it lay beside her. Thankful for the distraction, she scooped it up and answered eagerly.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Em. Its me."

Emily smiled, it was always great hearing from the brunette litigator. She surprised at how calm Spencer's tone was. It was two days before her party, usually she'd be a worked up ball of stress.

"Hey! What's up? And is it weird that you sounding calm is creeping me out?" Spencer laughed at the response.

"Oh, no. I'm totally freaking out. I just can't express it because my dear husband says I shouldn't worry about because "its not that big of deal". Total understatement of the year." Emily laughed and the two engaged in comfortable small talk, catching up on each other's hectic lives. Until Spencer finally spoke up about the reason she called.

"So, you're coming Saturday. Right?"

"Of course, Spence."

"Okay. So I was wondering if it would be okay if I invited Ali? I mean, I'm totally on your side of this break up, but she helped plan months before all that went down and I'd feel kind of guilty if I didn't invite her." Spencer rambled.

"Spencer. We're all adults. Even though we did break up, I didn't want you guys to have to pick sides." Emily sighed. Why did everyone think it will be so complicated between her and Ali? They were both mature. They could handle being in the same room together for a few hours.

"So, I can invite her?" Spencer clarified.

"Yes." Emily laughed. "Why did you think that you couldn't?"

"Well, Hanna told me about how she no longer talks to Ali on a personal level. Business only. And I figured if I invited her I would be a Team Emily traitor." Spencer confessed.

"There's no Team Emily. Or Team Alison. We're all friends, me and Ali aren't on the best terms right now, but eventually we will be." Emily responded. "As friends, or something more?" Spencer questioned. Emily honestly didn't know. Yeah, she did want Ali back in her life, eventually. But as more than a friend? She didn't know if she would be able to let the blonde back into her heart after this last heartbreak.

"I-I don't know." Emily replied honestly.

"Well, we were all friends when you guys were going through your weird-moody-angsty love affair. I'm sure we could do it again." Spencer joked.

"I'm sure we can." Emily laughed. The girls talked for a few more minutes until Spencer excused herself, claiming her husband was being needy. Emily heard Toby grumble something in the background about it being a lie. Emily returned to grading papers, but something was nagging at the back of her mind. Was Hanna really ignoring Alison, on her behalf? She had to admit, her loyalty was sweet. But she knew the only reason why Hanna and Alison's business thrived was because the two's personality's meshed easily. Emily crept out of her bed and slowly made her way downstairs. She found Hanna lounging on the couch, watching Grey's Anatomy. She joined her friend on the couch, intertwined their fingers and laid her head on her shoulder. Hanna looked down at her friend, and smirked.

"Ya know, Em I know its been awhile but I can't sleep with you." Hanna joked. Emily rolled her eyes and shoved her best friend slightly. Hanna laughed heartily before untangling their fingers and throwing an arm around Emily, pulling her closer.

"You know, Callie is such a babe." Hanna spoke after a few minutes of silence. "I bet she's your favorite character."

"Actually, no. Derek is my favorite character." Emily replied.

"Really? That's surprising." The duo sat in silence for the rest of the episode. Once it ended, Hanna switched off the TV and broke the silence.

"Even though I enjoy my Emily cuddles, I know they come with a price. Go on. Tell me what's on your mind." Emily smiled. Hanna knew her better than she knew herself.

"Han, you know I love you right?"

"Of course. I love you too."

"You know it would kill me if your business went under." Emily replied earnestly.

"Emily, why are you worried about the store? We're doing fine, more than fine actually." Hanna assured her friend.

"But, I know the biggest reason why it's such a success is because the friendship you and Ali have." Emily finished. "You know I'm right." Hanna sighed. She was right, there were many nights where the two blondes stayed up to collaborate ideas with each other, much to the disdain of their significant others. Hanna never thought in a million years that she would go into business with Ali, but despite everything they were great partners. These past few weeks, work had been almost unbearable with them barely speaking three words to each other.

"She was terrible to you, Em." Hanna reasoned.

"I know. But its not worth losing your dream. Nothing is." Hanna pulled her friend even closer.

"Emily Fields, you are amazing. I can't believe she let you go."

"Obviously. But I still have my game."

"Really? Do tell." Hanna asked amused.

"Zoe's preschool teacher, Stephanie."

"She's hot. A little younger than you."

"I know, I still got it." Emily joked.

"Sure, you do. You old lady." Hanna laughed.

"I'm younger than you." Emily pointed out. The girls made small talk for a few more minutes, until Caleb called out to Hanna, needily. The girls made their way upstairs, before Emily pulled Hanna to a stop.

"Promise you won't let my relationship issues ruin your business?"

"I promise." Hanna agreed as she gave Emily a tight hug.

* * *

Alison walked into the boutique with a peace offering of coffee. She was a little apprehensive about work today, she woke up with a text from Hanna saying that they needed to talk. She had no idea what this meant. Would it be a good talk, or bad one. She had no idea. She walked into the store and saw Hanna waiting for her, with bagels and other assorted pastries. She knew this conversation wouldn't be too bad, because Hanna had gone the extra mile and picked up her favorite spread: raspberry jam which was only sold at the organic market across town. This gesture made Alison's heart flutter. Tensions with Hanna had been running high lately and a peace treaty was really what she needed.

"We should talk." Hanna began.

"I would like that." Ali confessed softly.

"So, I had a talk with Emily last night." Alison's eyes grew wide at the mention of the tanned goddess. This was about Emily? Was she using Hanna as a messenger? Was this her extending an olive branch? She had so many questions running through her mind, but she couldn't articulate any of them.

"Woah. Slow down, tiger." Hanna laughed. "It's not about you two. Its about us." Alison deflated slightly.

"So, dearest Emily wanted to make sure our friendship doesn't die. She says we worked too hard to build this company." Hanna softly stated.

"We have," Alison agreed. "I don't want to see it die either."

"She's so freaking selfless." Hanna confessed. "She doesn't want to break our circle."

Alison sighed dreamily, Emily was perfect. Even though she broke her heart, she knew how much it would kill her if the boutique fell through. She cared enough to try and safe her and Hanna's friendship. And that fact alone gave her hope.

"She is."

"So even though I'm still pissed at you for hurting her, I think we could put that aside and mend our friendship. For us, for our business and for Emily." Hanna spoke softly.

"For Emily." Alison agreed while placing a hand on top of Hanna's. She smiled fondly at her friend, while they began to start their day. They discussed business, but they managed to weave a small amount of social talk into the conversation. It was a bit awkward at first, but eventually the conversation flowed easily.

"So," Hanna began casually. "What are you wearing to Spencer's party tomorrow?"

"I'm not sure." Alison admitted. "I might just stay home. I don't want to make Emily uncomfortable."

"You can't be afraid of Emily forever." Hanna countered.

"I'm not afraid."

"You totally are. Well, just an fyi Emily told Spencer to invite you." Hanna teased.

"She did?" Alison asked in disbelief.

"Well.. She told Spencer not to uninvite you."

"That's practically the same thing!" Alison exclaimed. "I need to find something to wear."

"I've got something perfect." Hanna replied. "Sabrina! Watch the register!" Hanna called as the two blondes disappeared into the back of the store.

* * *

Emily sipped her glass of champagne leisurely as she took in her surroundings. She was currently in a mid sized banquet hall that Spencer had rented. The room was filled with police officers, some in their dress blues others in their formal wear. Emily didn't look too bad herself. She was in a black lace number that Hanna had picked out for her, that hugged her in all of the right places. Although she looked like a man eater, Emily had absolutely nobody on her radar tonight. She was here just to support her friends' marriage and take advantage of the open bar. Emily decided that she should start to mingle around the room. She spotted Aria and Ezra seated in the corner, so she started to make her way towards them. Aria was dressed in a dark blue gown that didn't hide her baby bump, but didn't make her look bloated either. Ezra wore a dark blue dress shirt that matched Aria's dress, he finished off his ensemble with a black bow tie. Emily complimented her friends on their attire, and Ezra launched into a hilarious anecdote about a drunken student that showed up to his 8am class and threw up everywhere. The two women began to laugh, when Emily felt eyes glued to the back of her head. She looked around the room, and her eyes caught breath taking blue ones that she stared into for the last ten years of her life. Alison was wearing a black dress that concealed her barely visible baby bump. Her hair was curled in perfect ringlets that framed her face like flowing water. Emily was unable to tear her eyes away from the beauty that broke her heart. Alison held her gaze, a look of longing present in her eyes. She flashed Emily, a small, sincere smile that would've melted her heart when they were together. Emily returned it to the best of her ability, before quickly turning away. She downed the rest of her champagne quickly, before returning her attention back to Aria.

She was going to need a lot more alcohol than she thought.

* * *

The night progressed without too much trouble. Spencer and Toby floated around the room with the grace of a Hastings but the charm of a Cavanaugh. The best man and matron of honor were about to make their speeches when a loud commotion could be heard at the entrance of the hall. Officer Marcus Woodson waltzed into the banquet hall, hooting loudly.

"Toby, baby! I made it!" Toby made his way over to his partner and gave him a man-hug. Spencer's eyes widened with surprise at the sight of her husbands partner. He was supposed to be out of town, visiting a relative. At his appearance, Alison's eyes grew as wide as saucers as she whipped her head around in search of Emily. The latter was currently choking on a stuffed mushroom. The sound of her coughing was overshadowed by the excitement Marcus created. Hanna, who was rubbing soothing circles on a choking Emily's back locked eyes with Spencer who immediately knew what the look meant. Aria, saw the exchange from across the room and made her way towards the rest of the group. Alison quickly stood up, instinctually gravitating towards Emily. Aria who was seated next to the blonde put a hand on her shoulder, advising her to sit this one out. Alison protested, initially but realized that her friends would take care of Emily. Alison sat down and watched Aria meet her friends in who were heading towards the restroom.

* * *

"Spencer. You have ten seconds." Hanna demanded as she handed a water bottle to Emily who accepted gratefully.

"I know, Spence. Talk about dropping a bomb." Aria chided.

"Let me explain." Spencer pleaded. "He was supposed to be out of town. He told Toby he was going to be visiting his brother in Philly. He wasn't supposed to be here."

"Doesn't Toby know about what he did with Ali?" Emily piped up, finally catching her breath.

"Well. Um. No." Spencer answered nervously.

"What?!" The other three girls responded simultaneously.

"I didn't know how to tell him!" Spencer cried.

"Spencer, what did you do?" Aria cried.

"I'm going to need a lot more alcohol." Emily sighed.

* * *

Emily walked up to the open bar and ordered her third scotch and soda. She didn't didn't usually resort to alcohol to get through tough situations, but tonight was an exception. The bar tender eyed her warily, but served her anyway. As she awaited her order, she felt a body move up next to her. Marcus Woodson sat at the bar awaiting his order of a gin and tonic.

"Hey, there Miss Emily." He greeted. "Nice party, huh?" Emily rolled her eyes at the male beside her. This guy had some nerve.

"Don't talk to me like we're friends. We're not." Emily replied icily.

"Ouch." He replied in mock offense.

"I know what you did." Emily replied coldly.

Marcus opened his mouth, and closed it quickly. He thought about defending himself, denying the act but he chose not to.

"I don't know how to defend myself." He admitted truthfully. They stood in relative silence for awhile. Aria took the stage, claiming the microphone. She was Spencer's matron of honor and she went on telling a witty anecdote about Spencer and Toby in high school. She had the whole audience enthralled, except for Alison. The blonde sat at her table with her eyes fixated at the bar, where Emily stood with the worst mistake of her life. Her mind was racing wondering what they possibly could be talking about.

They audience giggled at something Aria said. Once they quieted down Emily started to engage in conversation with Woodson again.

"She's pregnant, you know."

Woodson's eyes widened and his face paled considerably. He took a large gulp of his gin and tonic, and collected his thoughts.

"How do you know it's mine?" He shot back defensively. "You obviously don't really know your woman, if you barely found about her infidelity even though we did the deed a few months ago."

"You don't even know if I was the first, do you?" He sneered when Emily didn't answer. "Come to think about it, I probably wasn't the first. Toby told me about how she was back in high school. Not exactly the Virgin Mary." Emily was getting mad. Even though she was drunk, she knew Ali. She knew how much the blonde loved her, and she didn't doubt it. Not now, not in high school not ever.

"Shut up." Emily growled. She heard Aria in the background her speech wrapping up.

"Why so angry?" Woodson taunted. "I know why. You're because you're realizing that your precious girlfriend was a Big. Fat. Whore." Emily registered Marcus' words. She threw back the rest of her scotch and soda quickly. As Aria was about to conclude her speech, a loud crack was heard from the bar area. The entire room faced the scene by the bar, Emily stood at the bar her eyes cold and hard knuckles bruised. While Officer Woodson sat next to her hand over his nose, blood rushing freely.

Emily Fields was arrested for assaulting a police officer.

* * *

**A/N: Like? Hate? Let me know!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thank you so much for all of the support! I am so happy you guys are enjoying this. P.S I have very little knowledge to how the justice system works. It has been changed countless times, I can't keep up. So I hope all the legal talk makes sense. **

* * *

Emily sat in the holding cell at the Rosewood County Jail. Tonight was just terrible. She had gotten drunk to avoid issues, but instead she had landed herself in an even bigger mess. She hadn't let her anger get the best of her in years, but tonight something inside of her snapped. Even though her and Alison weren't together, she was still her girl in some sense. And she wasn't going to just let the scoundrel disrespect her like that. Her thoughts were interrupted when an officer approached her cell and unlocked it.

"Fields, you're free to go." Emily quickly rose from her seat and followed the officer out of the holding area. In the lobby of the police station she was met with the lot of misfits that she called her friends. Aria was sitting next to Ezra, head on his shoulder eyes drooping sleepily. Hanna was curled up on Caleb's lap, head placed in the crook of his neck. Spencer was currently having a heated conversation with the officer at the front desk, Toby was no where to be found. Alison was currently pacing across the length of the lobby, much to the rest of the groups disdain. Emily walked into the lobby, looking utterly exhausted. Her hair was disheveled, make-up smeared and her right hand throbbed painfully. Alison was the first to lay eyes on her, immediately rushing to the brunettes side.

"Are you hurt?" Alison asked worriedly. She ran her hands up and down the girls body instinctually checking for any signs of injury. "I think your knuckles are broken." She murmured softly as she ran her thumb over the injured area. Emily hissed when Alison's finger came in contact with her knuckles. "You got him pretty good." Alison whispered in admiration.

"I tried." Emily answered "He was an ass." Alison continued to hold Emily's hand lightly. Thankful that she had the chance to be close to Emily, she savored the moment. The ex lovers stayed in their trance for a little while longer, until Spencer interrupted clearing her throat.

"I convinced Woodson not to press charges," Spencer stated. "So you're good to go."

"I have a feeling that you have a 'but' in your near vocabulary." Emily sighed. This whole situation was stressing her out.

"But." Spencer began "The DA, who witnessed the whole thing, suggested that you needed to receive some type of repercussion." Emily groaned. This was not going to be good.

"Its honestly not that bad." Spencer reasoned. "Just seven weeks of group therapy."

"Seven!?" Emily protested. "I thought you were supposed to be a good lawyer?"

"Don't push it, Fields." Spencer warned. "I got you out of an aggravated assault charge. You should buy me dinner."

"Yeah, right after you foot the bill for my doctors visit. I think it's broken." Emily retorted as she examined her hurt appendage. Spencer looked genuinely guilty, eyes softening as she took Emily's hand into her own.

"Its definitely broken." Spencer sighed. "C'mon, I'll drive you."

"Nope. You're going to go find your husband. He deserves an explanation." Emily stated firmly. Toby had been the only one left in the dark in this situation. After Emily had decked Woodson, there had been so much commotion that poor Toby was left desperately needing answers. The only reason why he wasn't at the station was because he was currently grilling his partner for answers.

"You're right, he's probably so mad." Spencer agreed. She was so not getting any sleep tonight. And not in the good way. Spencer bid goodbye to the group and left shortly after.

"Are you, okay Em?" A sleepy Aria asked from her position next to Ezra.

"I'm totally fine, Ar. You should go get some rest. You look exhausted." Aria removed herself from Ezra and made her way towards Emily and pulled her friend into a tight hug.

"No more punches, okay Mike Tyson?" Aria joked. Emily rolled her eyes in return. She was never going go live this down. Once the Fitz clan exited the police station, Caleb stood up with Hanna cradled in his arms, bridal style. She was sleeping, until the sudden movement jolted her awake.

"Caleb put me down." She whined. "We have to wait for Emily to get out of jail."

"I'm right here, Hanna." Emily assured. "I'm okay. I promise."

"How's your hand?" Hanna asked groggy yet concerned.

"I think I broke a couple of my knuckles. I'm heading over to the Emergency room right now." Emily replied.

"By yourself? Nope, I'm going with you."

"Hanna, I'm a grown woman. I can handle getting to the emergency room by myself." Emily brushed her off.

"Not a good enough answer." Hanna replied as she struggled out of Caleb's arms.

"Hanna, you've been worrying too much about me lately." Emily bargained. "I've got this trust me."

Hanna was about to protest when an unexpected voice piped up from beside Emily.

"I'll take her." Alison volunteered quietly. She knew both girls would probably shoot down her offer but she couldn't help but try.

"Yeah, Hanna. Ali will take me." Emily agreed quickly. Hanna raised an eyebrow at her tanned friend. Was she really going to spend three hours in a waiting room with her ex girlfriend? She didn't buy it. She was going to call Emily out on her bluff, but Alison beat her to the punch.

"Hanna, it will be fine. I promise." The blonde replied sincerely. Hanna eyed the ex couple warily. If she wasn't so exhausted then she would've probably argued a little more. But it was 2 am, and waiting in a hospital for three hours didn't sound too appealing.

"Well, okay." Hanna sighed. She walked over to Emily and gave her a hug, which the brunette returned. "Text me when you get home, okay?" Emily agreed quickly and ushered Hanna out the door. But the blonde wouldn't leave that easily.

"I expect a full report Monday, Alison!" Hanna cried as Caleb pulled her out of the room. Emily ran her fingers through her hair with her uninjured hand. She had tried to avoid being alone with Alison for weeks, and now she practically volunteered to. Alison urged her out of the police station and the two were met with the unforgiving autumn wind.

"You don't have to do this." Emily started. "I just wanted Hanna home, she's been stressing herself out too much."

"I want to." Alison replied quickly. "Please let me." Alison begged. She had been trying to have a conversation with Emily for weeks and she wasn't going to throw away this golden opportunity so easily. Emily sighed, how bad could it be?

"Okay," she agreed. The pair walked over to Alison's car, the blonde sliding into the drivers seat. Emily leaned her head against the cool glass window and rested her eyes. Alison looked over at her companion and smiled. Even if the night was a total catastrophe, she was with her girl and that made it all worthwhile.

* * *

Emily and Alison sat together in the waiting room of Rosewood Memorial Hospital. They had arrived over an hour ago, and they had been waiting for Emily's check in papers to be delivered. There was some car accident that had multiple injuries, so unfortunately most of the physicians were occupied.

"This is so not worth it." Emily groaned. "My hand doesn't even hurt that much."

"Really?" Alison asked in disbelief. She made a move to reach over and touch Emily's injured hand. The brunette flinched noticeably and quickly moved her and away from Alison's reach.

"Yeah, we're staying." The blonde declared as she gently reached for her ex girlfriend's hand. Emily flinched again, and Alison chuckled. "May, I?" Emily nodded, as Alison gently examined her hand.

"I think you should ice it." Alison stated. "I'm going to go find you some." The blonde stood quickly, before Emily pulled on her arm gently. Before Emily could pull her back, her name was called from the check in window. Alison walked over to the window with Emily in tow. The nurse at the station handed the women a clipboard, and instructed them to fill it out as quickly as possible. Alison took ahold of the paper and started to fill out the information out of habit. Emily watched surprised.

"How do you remember all of my information?" She asked curiously.

"We were together for five years, we were friends for longer then that. Even though we're going through a rough patch doesn't mean my memory just vanishes. I still know you.." Alison said softly. Emily sucked in a hard breath, she knew where this conversation was going. "And I still care about you. Alot." Alison faced Emily and looked her the eye. "You're the love of my life." A lone tear ran down Alison's face and she wiped it away quickly.

"Alison.." Emily said softly. "We don't have to talk about this. Not now, when you're not ready."

"Yes we do, Em. And I'm ready, I'm more than ready. I've been holding this in since you left." She took a deep breath. "I miss you. I'm so sorry about what I did. I'm so sorry that I hurt you. I beat myself up everyday that I'm not with you. And I know that you don't trust me, and I don't blame you. But I love you. And I would do anything for you to love me again." Alison finished, her voice raw with emotion.

"You think I don't love you?" Emily asked with a sarcastic chuckle. "After everything that happened, I still love you. That's why this is so messed up. You broke my heart and I should hate your guts, but I don't." Alison's eyes filled with tears, and her heart filled with hope. It had been way too long since Emily had said she loved her.

"I punched Woodson because of you." Emily admitted softly. "He was denying your baby, and saying these terrible things. About how he wasn't the first man you were with. He was trying to get under my skin. And something inside of me just snapped." Emily admitted as she started getting emotional. "I hit him because I was defending you. You have this hold on my heart, and I don't know if I can ever change that."

"I don't want you to change it." Alison said quickly. "I want you. I love you. You have a grip on my heart that is just as tight, but I don't want you to let it go." She replied earnestly.

"I don't know if I trust you with my heart, Alison. You broken it so many times, but this time it's taking so much longer to put the pieces back together. I don't know if I could survive another one."

"Emily, please. I can't live without you. These past weeks have been hell. I need you." Alison begged. "Ali, its not just you anymore." Emily sighed "You have a baby that you have to think about. And that should be your first priority. Not me." One tear fell down Emily's cheek as she uttered the words.

"I don't want to lose you, Emily." Alison cried "Is there ever going to be a chance for us? Maybe not soon, but is there?"

"I'm not going to say no. Because with me and you, it was never yes and no." Alison laughed at Emily's reference to their relationship. "And you're not going to lose me. We might not ever get back together, but eventually we'll be friends again." Emily promised. "I might not be Mommy to your baby, but I'll be Aunty Em. Like I am for Zoe, and for Aria's baby." Alison's tears started to come down harder. Emily was supposed to be Mommy. She deserved to be Mommy, not her.

"I'm sorry, Emily."

"I know you are." As the girl's conversation began to wind down, the nurse came to collect Emily.

"I'll be out in a few." Emily assured. "Go, and get yourself some gummy worms. And grab me some Doritos." Emily laughed as she was taken to get her hand examined. Alison looked longingly at the as she disappeared. Could she really live her life with Emily as 'just a friend'? It didn't work out in high school, but things have changed. Her heart would always belong to Emily Fields, that she was sure of. But would Emily's heart always belong to her?

* * *

Alison pulled up to the Rivers house at about 5am. It had been an extremely long night, the only upside was that she was with Emily. She put the car in park, and turned to face her ex.

"How are you feeling?" Alison asked.

"These painkillers are lovely." Emily slightly slurred.

"I'm so glad I didn't let you get your car." Alison replied with a laugh.

"I could totally drivee." Emily giggled. "Like a racecar driver."

"Really? Even with that thing on your hand?"

Emily frowned as she looked at the splint. It wasn't huge, but hadn't learned how to use her hand with it on.

"I'll learn." She argued.

"I know, Em."

The two sat in silence for a little while longer, until Emily let out a lion roar of a yawn.

"Alright, tiger. Let's get you to bed. Can you walk?"

"Of course." Emily assured. She opened up the car door and attempted to stand. She wobbled a bit until she carefully took a step. Alison laughed, she looked like a toddler who was taking their first steps. The blonde exited her vehicle and made her way over to the medicated brunette. She wrapped an arm around her slim waist and led her to the door.

"Where are your keys?"

Emily pushed her purse in front of Alison's face. Alison tightened her grip on the brunette's waist while she dug through her purse. She managed to pull out her keys and unlock the door while keeping a hold on Emily. She shut the door and made her way upstairs, Emily in tow. She pulled her into the guest room and placed her on the bed.

"Are you going to be okay?" Alison asked softly.

"Mhm." Emily groaned. She cocooned herself into her blankets and closed her eyes. Alison went over to the sleeping brunette and placed a kiss on her forehead. She figured Emily probably wouldn't remember the act in the morning, so why not. As Alison turned to leave, Emily grasped her hand.

"Stay."

Alison looked down at the drowsy, girl. She was totally vulnerable right now, and she would be totally taking advantage of her. Right? She was going to leave, Emily wasn't going to remember anyway.

"Please."

That word broke all of Alison's resolve, blue eyes locked with brown and it was over. She climbed into the bed with Emily, and closed her eyes. She kept a slight distance between Emily and herself. They weren't touching, but she could feel the brunette's heat radiating off of her. A few moments pass, and Alison feels herself drifting off when a warm body presses up against her. Emily rolled over, placing her head on Alison's chest and throwing an arm over her stomach. The blonde couldn't help but pull the girl closer. And with Emily's body snugly wrapped around hers, she fell into the most peaceful slumber that she had in months.

* * *

"I walked in here to check on Em and I found them like that."

"Why didn't you wake them up?!"

"I was in shock!"

"You don't think they did it. Did you?"

Emily was woken up by loud whispering coming from the other side of the door. She groaned, it was way too early to be awake especially after the night she had. She rolled over to grab her phone off the nightstand but she was held in place by a strong arm that was wrapped around her waist. Emily looked up to be met with a sleeping Alison Dilaurentis. Her mind raced, trying to piece together how she ended up in her current situation. As she became more awake, she began to recollect all of the events that transpired last night. She had asked Alison to stay, and by the looks of it, she didn't need much convincing.

"We should wake them up." She heard Spencer demand through the door."

"I think its sweet." Aria cooed.

"I'm undecided." Hanna added.

While the three debated about if or when they should wake them up, Emily started to shake Alison awake. The blonde groaned, annoyed that her slumber was getting interrupted. She tightened her grip on Emily and tried to ignore whoever was trying wake her.

"Alison." Emily whispered as she nudged her. "We have to wake up."

"I don't wanna."

"I know, I'm tired too. But the girls are standing outside the door and I have a pretty good feeling that they will make their presence known very soon."

Alison reluctantly let go of Emily and rolled over to her side of the bed.

"Did I spoon you last night?"

"I think so."

"Hmm. No wonder why I slept so good." The blonde replied as she slowly rose from the bed. She walked over to the door and opened it quickly, revealing three gawking girls.

"Good morning, beautiful." Spencer smirked at the blonde's tousled hair.

"Good morning." Alison greeted back.

"So, why were you sleeping in Emily's bed?" Hanna asked, getting straight to the point.

"I asked her to stay." Emily says as she approached the group for the first time. "We stayed up all night, and I didn't think it was safe for her to drive home."

"Is that right?" Hanna asked in disbelief.

"Yes."

"So are you guys like, back together now?" Spencer asked timidly.

"No," Emily answered quickly. "But we are trying to become friends again."

The other three girls looked back and forth between the two. They clearly had unresolved feelings towards each other, they just didn't know how to deal with them.

"I think that's great." Aria beamed. "how's your hand, Em?"

"Two broken knuckles. I have to wear this thing for six weeks. And ice regularly."

"That's what you get for going all King Kong on the guy." Hanna joked.

Emily stuck her tongue out at her blonde friend, which Hanna easily returned.

"I'm hungry." Aria stated. "Let's make breakfast?"

"That sounds pretty amazing." Emily confesses. All five of them haven't been together in a long time, it would be a good test of her and Ali's newfound friendship.

"Yeah, as long as Hanna stays away from the eggs." Spencer snorted. "I nearly choked to death on all of those eggshells she left in my omelet."

"That was one time!" The blonde argued.

The friends laughed remembering the time they let Hanna anywhere near the stove. She was reassigned to toast and fruit preparation.

"Hey, Han do you have something I can wear? I need to get out of this dress." The three girls glanced at Emily and Alison, finally noticing that they were still wearing their clothes from the previous night.

"Yeah, sure. C'mon. Aria, just keep Spencer away from the coffee maker." With those parting words, the four went separate ways. Aria and Spencer to the kitchen, Emily disappeared back into her room to change her clothes and Hanna led Alison to her room.

"Where are Caleb and Zoe?"

"Caleb took her to go see his Dad. There spending the day at the lake. My baby is going to be so messy when she gets back." Hanna complained as she handed Alison some clothes.

"Ali, what are you doing?"

Alison whipped her head around to face her friend, confusion etched on her face.

"I'm changing..?"

"No. What are you doing with Emily?"

"I'm not doing anything. Which sucks."

"I won't just stand by and let you break her heart again, Ali. She was destroyed this last time. She's barely putting herself back together." Hanna warned.

"I'm not going to lie, I want her back in my life. I want her to be mine again. And I would do anything for her, but she made it very clear last night that we may never be an us again. And as much as it kills me, its what she wants and I'll give her anything she wants." Alison finished voice raw with emotion. Hanna eyed her warily, not sure if she wanted to believe her. The old Alison would do whatever necessary to get what she wanted, even though she has changed Hanna didn't trust her completely.

"Just be careful with her." Hanna warned.

"Trust me, Han if she gives me another chance with her heart I'll cherish it. Forever."

A loud clang could be heard from the kitchen and you could hear Emily's hysterical laughing startup.

"We better get down there," Hanna laughed.

As the blonde duo made their way down stairs they were met with a hilarious sight. Emily was leaning against the counter laughing while Spencer was trying to hold back a very angry Aria.

"What happened?" A very confused Alison asked.

"Aria's belly knocked over the plate of pancakes. Emily lost it." Spencer explained.

"Em, that's mean." Hanna scolded.

"You didn't see her face!" Emily defended.

"I hate you." Aria whined, clearly agitated.

At her friends distressed voice, Emily controlled her laughter considerably.

"I'm sorry, Aria. I just needed a good laugh." Emily apologized, and embraced Aria. The five of them went to work, each taking on a certain task. Hanna cleaned up the broken glass, while Aria started on a second batch of pancakes. Spencer started on the fresh squeezed orange juice, Emily decided to make bacon while Alison worked on the scrambled eggs. When they all finished their individual tasks, breakfast was ready. They sat down, and started to eat falling into easy small talk.

"So, Spence how did everything with Toby go?" Aria asked.

"He was mad. At me, then at Alison and finally at Woodson." The awkwardness in the room suddenly got significantly thicker, but Spencer continued anyways. "He requested a partner change." The only sound coming from the girls was a clink of forks with plates and chewing.

"So, this is lovely. But can we please have a normal conversation?" Hanna stated bluntly.

The girls fell into comfortable conversation and finished breakfast on a light note. They were in the process of cleaning up the kitchen when Caleb and Zoe stumbled through the door.

"Mama! I missed you!"

Hanna scooped up her daughter and held her close.

"Hi, baby. I missed you too." The baby blonde snuggled into her Mom until she caught sight of her aunts.

"Mama! You didn't say we was having a party?" The little girl asked.

"We're not, Zoe."

"But everybody is here! Even Aunt Ali!"

The toddler scrambled out of her mother's arms and went over to Alison.

"Aunt Ali did you get your time out?"

"Zoe.." Emily warned.

"Why would I get a time out?" Alison asked.

"Cuz you hurt aunt Em's feelings." The toddler stated like it was obvious. Alison processed the words and tried to explain as best as she could. She bent down until she was eye level with her niece.

"I'm still in timeout, baby." Alison said softly.

"Well did you at least say sorry?"

"I did," Alison admitted. "But sometimes its not enough."

"Aunty Em, did you forgive her?"

"I-" Emily stopped suddenly. Had she truly forgiven her?

"Okay, Zoe. Let's get you in the shower. You smell like mud." Hanna picked up her daughter and started to make her way upstairs.

"Hey, Han are you still free Thursday?" Spencer called.

"Yeah. Me and Ali will meet you at the paint store around five? Sound good?"

"Yeah, that'll work. I better get going, I still have some making up to do with Toby." Spencer turned to leave bidding everyone goodbye.

"Em, you owe me breakfast tomorrow. 7:30 sharp." Aria commanded as she turned to leave. Emily mock saluted.

"Well I guess that's my cue." Alison said softly as she turned to leave.

"Hey, Ali." Emily called before she left. Alison turned and faced the brunette. "Maybe we could go get coffee sometime? You know, as friends."

Alison smiled. At least Emily was trying. And after all that happened that's all that she could ask for.

"Yeah, sure. As friends." Alison smiled, maybe just maybe everything isn't lost.

* * *

**A/N: So this was a short little filler, it was necessary. So I'm moving into my dorm room Friday, so its going to be a little while until the next update. Let me know if you liked it!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: S****_o I have only two classes today, so I thought I'd get some writing done. Hope you like it!_**

8

"Spencer, you cannot paint this room nthat shade of green. Its a total eyesore."

"Hanna, its a perfectly fine shade of green. Its a calming color."

"Ali, please tell her that she's insane." Hanna argued. Alison studied the decor of the room carefully. "It is a calming color," She began. "But it also kind of reminds me of puke." Hanna chuckled while Spencer rolled her eyes, annoyed.

"You two are worse than Aria and Em." Spencer sighed.

"Really?" Hanna questioned "Aria is artsy."

"She can draw, but she can't coordinate color schemes for the life of her." Spencer teased.

"I think this room should be a dark purple." Alison added. "Green is too boring."

Spencer contemplated Ali's thought for a moment.

"No, I want it green." She decided.

Alison rolled her eyes. Why did Spencer ask them to help if she was not open to suggestions? It puzzled her about how complicated that girl was.

"Well are we done?" Alison asked impatiently.

"I guess." Spencer answered. "Where do you have to go?"

"I'm meeting Em for coffee."

Hanna and Spencer turned to face her with questioning looks on their faces.

"Umm, excuse me?" Hanna asked

"We're. Going. To. Coffee." Alison stated slowly. "You know, the brown caffeinated drink that everyone is addicted to?"

"We know what coffee is, Ali." Hanna stated dryly.

"Its just, why are you and Emily going on a coffee date?" Spencer added.

"Its not a date." Alison argued. "I just want to spend time with her, that's all."

"So, you wouldn't mind if I tagged along?" Hanna asked with a smirk.

Alison narrowed her eyes at her blonde friend. Of course she would mind. She savored all the alone time she had with Emily, which was not very abundant these days.

"I don't really have that much alone time with Em.." Alison trailed off.

"Alison. You have to stop. You can't keep torturing yourself like this." Spencer declared.

"What do you mean?" Alison shot back.

"You can't keep chasing someone who doesn't want you." Spencer said softly. "You broke her, Ali. Numerous times. You can't expect her to just fall back into your arms."

"Well what do you want me to do?" Alison hissed, becoming angry. "Stand by and idly watch as she falls in love with another woman?" Alison's voice broke with emotion. She could not stand the thought of Emily with someone else. "I will never stop trying. She's the love of my life."

"Ali," Hanna began softly "I know she's the love of your life. And you're hers." Alison smiled at the confession. "But you guys aren't together. Not anymore, and I'm not sure you'll ever be together again. She's broken and you're broken, you can't be whole together unless you fix yourselves first."

"And I know Emily is a huge part of your life, but you've got something coming that's more important than the both of you." Spencer pointed out. "You're going to be a Mom, Alison. You need to realize that."

"Don't talk to me like I'm a child." Alison replied. "I know! I know Emily probably hates me. I know that I'm going to be a mother, I do. But I can't just give up! She's my dream! She's all I've ever wanted and I can't just roll over and let her go. I just can't." Alison finished with a tear rolling down her cheek. "I have to go, I'm going to be late." Alison exited quickly, making her way towards her car. She wasn't going to give up. Although everyone doubted her, she was going to prevail. She had to.

8

Emily tapped her foot impatiently. Why was she doing this again? She was currently sipping a double espresso while a chai tea latte sat untouched across from her. She was about to text Alison, asking where she was when the blonde in question came bustling through the door of the Brew.

"I'm sorry I'm late." She apologized. "Spencer and Hanna held me up."

"I figured," Emily replied. "I was about to call and tell you we could reschedule, if you were too busy-"

"No." Alison quickly cut her off. "I'm never too busy for you." She said sincerely.

Emily ducked her head and tried to hide her blush. She mentally kicked herself. Why did Alison still hold this power over her? It drove her crazy.

"I, uh ordered you a chai tea.."

"Perfect." Alison beamed as she took a sip of her beverage.

The duo sat in relative silence for a spell, a mix between awkward and comfortable. They didn't know how to be around each other. Alison took a long sip of her drink before she finally spoke up.

"I'm glad you agreed to meet,"

"Well, I kind of suggested it."

"I know, its just I'm glad you're here."

"Ali," Emily began slowly.

"I miss you." The blonde declared suddenly. "And I don't just mean the you that was my girlfriend. Even though I miss that part of our relationship more than anything. I miss our friendship, too. We were friends before we were lovers."

"I-." Emily trailed off trying to rearrange her thoughts. "I miss you, too. Even though I shouldn't."

"You should." Alison replied a little too enthusiastically. "I mean, we were the biggest part of each others lives for over a decade. Those feelings don't just disappear."

"It would be easier if they did." Emily admitted honestly. Alison flinched noticeably.

"No it wouldn't." Alison replied. "What we have is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. I know you hate me, and I completely understand I hate me too." She locked her blue eyes with brown, before she continued. "But you and I, we shared something amazing. And forgetting wouldn't make it better, because the memories we share are better than any other love."

"Alison." Emily let out a shaky whisper.

"Emily, I'm not giving up. I'm going to prove to you that I'm worth it."

"I can't let you break me, Alison." Emily replied. "Not again, I'm still trying to put myself back together. You can't ask me to take you back. Because that's unfair."

"That's not what I'm asking." She repkie quickly. "I'm asking you not to give up on me, on us."

"I can't promise you anything, Ali."

"But?" The blonde prompted.

"But," Emily continued slowly. "I'll keep an open mind."

8

Emily sat at her desk and stared at the humongous stack of papers. She needed to have quarter grades inputted before they left for Thanksgiving break, which was in five days. Her useless TA left for an early vacation last week, so she was even more behind. She knew it had to get done, she just didn't want to do it. She pulled the first stack in front of her while clutching her trusty red pen. Emily began marking the first student's paper, when her phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Em its Hanna."

"I do have caller ID, ya know."

"Yeah, but I bet you didn't check it."

Emily rolled her eyes at her eyes at her blonde friend. She knew her too well.

"What's up?" The brunette answered after a beat of silence.

"I need you to pick up Zoe."

"Han, I told you I'm behind on grading. I really can't, where's Caleb?"

"He got held up at work. And I can't leave, its our Thanksgiving sale, we're totally packed." Hanna pleaded. "Plus, I really want you to see Miss Stephanie again. You've been in a sort of funk since you had coffee with Alison."

It was true. Ever since she had coffee with Alison her mind wouldn't shut up. Did she want Alison back? Or did want to start again with someone new? She didn't know, and the more she thought about it, the more she was confused.

"You're right." Emily sighed.

"Of course I am." Hanna sing songed. "See you at home!"

Emily sighed. She really needed more will power when it came to blondes.

8

"Thanks so much, come again." Alison said as she handed the last customer of the day their receipt. She was exhausted, everything in the store was discounted which meant they were super busy. She just wanted to go home, pull on some of Emily's sweats and fall into bed.

"I'm exhausted." Hanna declared voicing Alison's precious thoughts.

"I know," Alison agreed. She walked over to the front of the store and clicked the neon sign off.

"We need to hire someone else." Hanna sighed. Sabrina was barely working ten hours a week because of scheduling conflicts with her classes. They were short handed especially since Alison was in her fourth month of pregnancy which limited her slightly.

"We'll put up the Help Wanted sign." Alison agreed. She began her part of the closing routine, while Hanna did hers. They were almost finished, when Alison piped up.

"Han?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think Emily is ever going to forgive me?"

"Eventually, she will." Hanna started. "She's Emily, the most loyal person ever. She's like a puppy. If you step on her tail, she'll be timid around you for a while but eventually she'll come back and lick your face." Hanna joked.

"I'm just scared."

"Of what?"

"I know Emily is it for me. I've known for awhile now. But, I'm scared I'm not it for her." Alison admitted softly.

"Ali, you just have to keep an open mind." Hanna assured.

"It kills me when I'm not with her.. I know she needs space, I get it. But she's okay without me. And that's the part that terrifies me."

8

Emily made her way towards Zoe's classroom on autopilot. She loved her god daughter, but she really didn't want to see her teacher, not today. She knew she was attracted to Stephanie, but ever since she met with Alison her mind has been occupied with thoughts of her ex girlfriend. Will she ever forgive Alison completely? If they did get back together, what would she be to Ali's baby? Mommy? Emily shook her head, could she really parent Woodson's kid? That guy was a scumbag. But, it was half Alison's. And she loved Alison. Underneath all the resentment, she did love her. She just didn't know if she was ready to be in love with her again. Emily plastered a smile on her face and entered Zoe's classroom.

"Hello there, aunty Em."

Emily turned around to face Zoe's teacher, the younger woman showcasing her sweet smile.

"Hey, teacher Stephanie." Emily smirked back.

The preschool teacher rolled her eyes playfully.

"We haven't seen you around here lately." She teased.

"Well, I've been super busy living my double life as Elsa from Frozen." Emily joked.

"Come on, Aunt Emily. Let it go." Stephanie deadpanned.

The two women engaged in comfortable small talk for a few more minutes until Zoe finally noticed Emily. Miniature Hanna grabbed her things and was by Emily's side instantly.

"It was nice seeing you." Emily said softly as her and Zoe turned to leave.

"Wait," Stephanie shot out quickly. "Umm, Zoe did you remember to pick up your take home book this afternoon?"

"Yes."

"What about your artwork that was on the drying rack?"

"Yes."

"Your play dough sculpture?"

"Yes."

Stephanie sighed frustratedly, Zoe was such a bright kid.

"Well, how about you go to my desk and get my gold stars? You definitely deserve one."

The little girl bounded over to her teacher's desk in pursuit of the stars.

"Now that little Miss Sunshine is gone for a second, I have something to ask you."

"Yeah?" Emily asked, slightly intrigued.

The younger teacher took a deep breath and looked at the tanned woman in the eyes.

"I know this might be a little forward, but I was wondering if young be interested in grabbing a cup of coffee with me?"

8

She hated hospitals. If there was one place that Alison Dilaurentis tried to avoid, it was a hospital. The place just smelled like death, and it gave Alison an ominous feeling in the pit of her stomach. But she had to get over her strange phobia, and soon because she was going to be spending a lot of extra time at the hospital. She sighed, this was not an ideal situation for bringing a baby into this world. But she got herself into this mess, and now she has to clean it up. She jumped as her name was called from the reception area, as she was summoned to the back. The nurse did the standard work up on her: height, weight, blood pressure, etc. She was then led to the exam room to wait for the doctor. Alison looked around the room and took in her surroundings. There were informational posters about the life cycle of the fetus and its growth. But the thing that astonished her the most was the diagram of the vagina. Her little, petite vagina was going to be destroyed during natural birth. She made a mental note to ask her doctor about a cesarean. She was knocked out of her daydreaming when the doctor entered the room with an ultrasound machine.

"Hello, Ms Dilaurentis. I'm Dr. Kepner, I'll be your OB GYN during your pregnancy. It says you're about four months along, and this is your first check up?"

"Well, I uh just decided recently that I was going to keep the baby." Alison responded timidly.

"Well that's good to hear," The ginger doctor smiled at her. "So let's begin." The doctor picked up her clipboard and began her long line of questions. They were basically about her job and eating habits.

"Is the father in the picture?" The doctor inquired.

"No." Alison practically scoffed.

"A second mother?"

"No, um. Just no." Alison stuttered.

The doctor wrote down her answers and continued to ask questions. When she finally finished, she grabbed a tube of jelly.

"This is going to be a little cool." The doctor warned as she squirted some on Alison's belly.

"Oh." Alison gasped as the cool substance was rubbed on her skin. The doctor flipped on the machine and placed it on her stomach.

"Let's find that heartbeat."

After a few moments of dead silence, the room illuminated with a steady beating. Alison's eyes watered as she heard her child's heartbeat for the first time. It was one of the most beautiful sounds that she had ever heard. The tears started to flow more freely as she continued to listen. It was life altering. She had decided right there, lying on that exam table that she loved her unborn child more than anything. She reached up to wipe her tears, as the doctor moved the machine around on her belly.

"Let's see if we can find the sex, its a little early but there's still a chance." The doctor focused intently on the screen as she searched for genitalia.

"Congratulations, Ms. Dilaurentis. You're having a baby girl."

Alison's chest heaved as her crying grew a little more hysterical. She was going to be a mother, to a girl. A girl who would hopefully have all of her features. A girl who would think she was the most amazing woman in the world, even though at times she wasn't. A girl who would look up to her, and would think she hung the stars. As Dr. Kepner printed out a picture of her sonogram, and handed it to her she couldn't help but be overwhelmed. She was going to have a daughter in a few months. She told herself she would never love another woman besides Emily, but she was head over heels in love with her baby girl.

8

She was going to kill Spencer.

Emily was currently sitting in the community center, in a circle with other who were sentenced to group counseling. It was terrible. She found herself among domestic abusers, people with serious anger issues, some with alcohol and drug addictions. She did not belong here, she wasn't a criminal. These seven weeks better go by quickly.

"Good evening, everyone. I'm Shirley Evans, and I will be your group leader for the next seven weeks. The first thing we'll do is go around the room and state why you are here. And don't say, because the judge made me be here. I want to know what physical action landed you here, and what emotions brought on that physical action."

Emily listened as people tried to explain why they had committed crimes. Most of them made sense, others were a little outlandish. She tensed up as the whole room's eyes landed on her.

"I'm Emily," she began "And my physical action was assaulting an off duty police officer." Most of the room's eyes widened in surprise. She did not look like the type who would assault a police officer. "The emotions behind the action were anger, and I guess some form of jealousy."

"Expand a little more on the jealousy." Shirley commented.

"Well the police officer in question had slept with my, well now ex girlfriend. He was just trying to push my buttons and I snapped." Emily explained quietly.

"Do you think you handled the situation to the best of your ability?" Shirley inquired.

"I guess not," Emily chuckled "but it felt really good to hit him."

The support group erupted in giggles while Shirley gave her an understanding smile. She moved onto the next person, leaving Emily with her thoughts. She would do anything for Alison, which included the breaking of some knuckles. Could she let everything go and forgive her?

8

Alison strolled down the streets of Rosewood, shopping bags fisted in both hands. She had decided to spoil herself and buy some maternity clothes. She was about to get into her car when she heard the most beautiful voice in the entire world fill her ears.

"The Brew?" Emily questioned with a laugh. "This is so high school."

"They have the best frappuccinos in town!" Stephanie defened.

Alison rolled her eyes, Emily didn't consider iced coffee "real coffee".

"It's not real coffee." Emily answered back.

"Then what is real coffee?" The younger woman questioned.

Alison smiled softly, recalling the time Emily had explained to her what real coffee was.

8

_The two sat together in the corner of a small coffee shop just outside of Rosewood. They were on a coffee date, one that Alison had shyly asked Emily on a week before. It was April of their senior year, graduation was a few weeks away and the two were finally testing the waters of their relationship. The barista made their way over to their table placing the girl's orders in front of them. _

_"I thought you said this was a coffee date?" Emily questioned. _

_"It is, Em." Alison replied slightly confused. _

_"But you're not drinking real coffee?" _

_Alison looked down at her caramel frappuccino, bewildered. _

_"Then what am I drinking?" _

_"An iced beverage." Emily replied matter of factly. "And although I do enjoy them, they are not considered real coffee." _

_Alison raised her eyebrow at the girl across from her quizzically. _

_"Care to explain?"_

_Emily took a long sip of her Italian roasted coffee. _

_"You see, when I was a little girl, I used to spend the Summers in Maine with my grandparents." Emily began. "Every morning, my grandpa and I would get breakfast together at this little coffee shop by the beach. We sat their with our mugs, mine filled with hot chocolate of course, and stared at the ocean." Emily took another drink if her beverage. "And after my grandma died, having coffee with my grandpa became rarer, but more special. He was heartbroken after she died, he went mute. Right before he died, we had one last cup of coffee together. We didn't talk much as usual, but when we were done drinking he turned to me and smiled. A huge, genuine smile. A smile that conveyed everything he wanted to say, without even saying it. He died two weeks later." Emily took a deep breath before continuing. "When I say real coffee, I mean what type of drink would I have with my grandchild right before I die?" Emily ducked her head slightly embarrassed. "I know, its kind if weird but-"_

_Alison stood up and cupped Emily's face gently, giving her a quick kiss on the lips. _

_"No," Alison began shakily. "That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard." She pulled back and signaled the barista. "I'll have what she's having." _

8

"Wow.." Stephanie began as she took in Emily's words. "That was totally sad, way to bring down the mood Aunty Em." The tanned girl didn't have a chance to respond because the younger girl captured her lips with her own. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't the best kiss she's ever had. The younger girl pulled back, grabbed her hand and drug her into the coffee shop.

Alison watched the scene in front of her, tears flowing freely. She had just watched the love of her life get kissed by another woman. It was terrible. Alison quickly entered her car and slammed her door shut. She began to cry freely, she pounded on the steering wheel. Let all of her emotions run freely, all of the anger, sadness, and now jealousy coursing through her veins. After about ten minutes if her little tantrum she began to settle down. Her breathing began to even out as she wiped the slowing tears from her face. As much as she wanted to march into the Brew and snatch Emily from the claws of the daycare teacher, she couldn't. Emily was moving on, and as much as she didn't like it she had to accept it. For her sake, Emily's and her daughter's.

"I guess it's really just me and you, baby girl." Alison spoke to her stomach as she rested her hand protectively on her abdomen. She turned on the ignition, put her car in drive and drove away.

8

**A/N: 100 reviews! I love you guys! College has been great by the way! Let me know what you think. **


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Reviews make me soooo happy! Thank you so much for the support, I'm glad you guys are enjoying this.**

* * *

Emily sighed as she stepped through the threshold of the Rivers household. She had definitely been on one of the worst dates ever. Stephanie was a sweetheart, she was and Emily admired the love she had for her daycare kids. Its just every time they started talking about regular, first date topics Emily's mind would drift off and remember the dates she had with Alison and the conversations they shared. She was totally in another world the entire time, and it wasn't fair to Stephanie. So, Emily had awkwardly ended the date after the first cup of coffee. When Stephanie tried to give her a goodbye kiss she not so subtly turned her head. She felt terrible, this girl had genuinely showed an interest in her but she was too hung up on her ex to give her a chance.

"Hey, Em! How was your date with Miss Teacher-Lady?" Hanna asked as she was stirring something on the stove.

"Terrible." Emily answered shortly.

"Why? I thought you said she was into you?"

"She was, I just wasn't as into her as I thought I was." Emily said quietly.

"Em." Hanna whined. "You didn't even give her a chance!"

"There's no point, Hanna." Emily argued. "I'm supposed to be with Alison. It doesn't make sense to deny it."

"Are you sure about this, Em? I don't want you to just run back to her because you had a bad date." Hanna questioned.

"I'm sure, Han. I've been thinking about this for weeks now. I think my date solidified it." Emily assured.

"So you want her back?"

"She's my Alison. She's always been mine." Emily breathed out, a weight being lifted off of her chest.

"Just be careful, Em. I support you, I just don't want you to get hurt again." Hanna asked concerned.

"With Ali, my heart has always been at risk." Emily said softly. "But being with her is so worth it." Hanna contemplated her best friend's words before asking the question that hung between them.

"What about the baby?"

Emily sighed. The baby made everything more complicated. She wanted to be a mother, she did and she wanted to parent a child with Ali more than anything.

"I, uh I want to be there for her. In anyway she wants me to be. As a parent, or as anything she wants me to be."

Hanna wiped away a stray tear, her friend was such a sweetheart.

"When are you going to tell her?" Hanna questioned a little overcome with emotion.

"Is she still coming over for Thanksgiving?" Emily questioned.

"I think so."

"That's where I'll do it." Emily smiled.

"She doesn't deserve you, ya know."

"Maybe not, but its always been her. Even when she was "dead" it was her." Emily sighed.

"You're such a romantic, Fields."

"I try, Marin. I try."

* * *

Alison sighed as she flipped through the channels on her television. It was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, and she had absolutely nothing to do. The store would be closed until Monday, and she was bored out of her mind. She contemplated calling one of her friends and begging them to entertain her, but there was a risk that Emily would be there. She had decided that the only way she was going to get over the brunette goddess was if she isolated herself from her for awhile. She hated that she had given up, but it was for the best. Alison reached her hand into the bag of chips and grabbed a handful and stuffed it in her mouth. Who cares if she was having a self induced pity party? It was a free country. As she was lifting another handful of chips in her mouth her phone buzzes beside her.

_Hey, Ali. Are you still going to Hanna's for Thanksgiving? _

It was a text from Emily, of all people. It took every ounce of her willpower not to pick up her phone and text back. She needed to do this, even though it killed her. She tossed her phone frustratedly, why did she choose to go cold turkey from Emily now? Oh, yeah. Emily was kissing another woman. This thought made Alison feel a bit better about her decision. Even though she had no right to judge Emily for moving on, it still stung. They were together for practically a decade, and she found a new hussie after two months? It was like she meant nothing to her. Alison wrinkled her brow. She was angry, and that was the last thing she wanted to be. She was still in love with Emily, there was no doubt about that. But, her friends were right. Her and Emily couldn't be together if they were both broken. And for all that she knew, they were both progressing in the self healing process. She was getting her priorities straight while Emily was apparently going to therapy. As much as she didn't want to admit it in the beginning, this break was good for them. They were growing as people, and hopefully this would strengthen their relationship.

_Ali..? Are you there? You usually respond, I hope you're okay. _

Alison sighed. She didn't know how much longer she could do this.

_Call me if you need me! _

Probably not much longer.

* * *

Emily stared at her phone, puzzled. Alison wasn't replying to her text messages. There were two viable reasons for this occurrence. Alison was either lying in a ditch fighting for her life, or she was ignoring her. Both of these scenarios did not make any sense. Alison was ignoring _her? _She had no reason to be doing so! It kind of angered her. Emily sighed frustratedly, if she didn't have class then she'd march over to their once shared apartment and demand an explanation. But she did, and by the end of the school day, her passionate anger will have melted away and considerate, level headed Emily would have talked her out of it. Emily shook her head in dismay. Thanksgiving was tomorrow, she was planning on tell Ali about her feelings in less than twenty four hours. But she didn't know if the blonde would show up, let alone speak to her. It drove her insane, but it was Alison she was so unpredictable sometimes, it drove her wild. But she loved her, and she knew she didn't want anyone else. Emily pulled a hand through her hair, what if she was too late? What if Alison realized that Emily wasn't worth waiting for? That thought alone made her shiver. If Alison was really done with her, she'd accept it. Alison didn't want to be a parent with her anyways. Emily's student's began filling in for the first class of the day. Emily let the thoughts of Alison drift from her mind as she devoted her full attention to her students.

"Alright, someone tell me the atomic number for Fluorine." Emily stated as the tardy bell sounded. The entire class avoided eye contact, except for the expected overachiever.

"Anyone besides Jeremiah?" She pleaded.

Not a single student raised their hand and Emily let out an audible groan. These are the times she wishes she would have gone into Kinesiology instead.

"Well, I guess we need a little review then. Class open your textbooks to page 220."

* * *

Emily sighed as she walked into the Marin-Rivers household. She just wanted to go up to her room and sleep off this terrible day. But she had promised Zoe that she would help her decorate for tomorrow night's dinner, and she told Hanna that she would help prepare said dinner. Sometimes she hated being such a pushover.

"Aunty Em!" Zoe squealed as she walked through the door.

"Hey, sugar." Emily greeted "Where's Mama?"

"Mama's in the kitchen!" Came Hanna's voice.

Emily laughed as she made her way towards one of her oldest friends. Hanna was currently preparing the turkey to be put in the oven for overnight cooking.

"Looks like you don't need my help after all." Emily mused as she took in her surroundings. The counters were spewed with various food preparations ranging from pie to ham. It all looked pretty darn good, too.

"Spencer challenged me yesterday. She claims that my first Thanksgiving that I host will be terrible compared to the one she put on last year." Emily chuckled at the proposition. She didn't have any doubt in Hanna, but Spencer threw amazing dinner parties.

"So far, so good Hanna." Emily complimented as she stuck her finger into the pie batter that Hanna was about to mix.

"Hey! Hands out, you vulture! Sheesh, you're worse than Zoe!"

Zoe's head popped up at the mention of her name. Emily met her eye and lifted an accusing eyebrow at her. The little girl just shrugged her shoulders and went back to her job of creating individual placemats.

"Its so good, Han! I can't help it."

The two sat in silence for a bit while Hanna proceeded to stir the pie mix. When she finished, Emily spoke up from her place at the island countertop.

"So, have you uh heard from Ali lately?" Emily asked trying to be as subtle as possible.

"I haven't. She's supposed to call me tonight though, I need to know what she's bringing."

Emily frowned at her answer. Well at least Alison wasn't only ignoring her. It still didn't ease the knots forming in her stomach.

"Are you chickening out, Em?"

"No, its just I texted Ali earlier and she didn't respond. I think she's ignoring me."

"For what? You didn't do anything wrong. Did you?"

"Not that I know of?" Emily answered, still slightly confused herself.

"Maybe its a sign.." Hanna mused.

" Indicating what?"

"That maybe you two are really done."

Emily contemplated her friends words for a bit. What if she was right? What if she had waited too long to reconnect with Ali?

"I'll figure it out when I see her." Emily replied honestly.

Hanna raised her perfectly sculpted eyebrow at her friend before shrugging, much like her daughter had done moments before.

"Whatever, Romeo. Just remember, when Romeo dies who lives? The Friar. You know why? Cause that guy would've been the one to Hanna Marin's advice.

Emily couldn't help but roll her eyes at the response. Hanna's advice had two ranges: really good and absolutely terrible. No in between.

"Okay, Han. The one who would've taken your advice is Mercutio." Emily joked.

"Was he was a Romeo or a Juliet?" Hanna genuinely asked.

Emily laughed obnoxiously. She loved her best friend.

"Oh, Han. You're worse than my high school kids."

The two friends laughed and joked while Hanna finished preparing dinner. Emily divided her time between coloring with Zoe and helping Hanna with miscellaneous jobs. As they were putting everything in the fridge for the night, Hanna's phone buzzed from the counter.

_Hey, Han. I don't think I'll be going to dinner tomorrow. I'm sorry. _

Hanna's eyes grew a little larger as she reread the text.

"Em?" She called to the brunette.

"Yeah?"

"Alison isn't coming anymore."

* * *

Alison hiccuped as she wiped away the remainder of her tears. She was watching a rerun of Dear John, and she was feeling particularly lonely that evening. She had no plans for Thanksgiving, her father was in the Hamptons spending it with his new wife and her children. She hadn't spoken to her brother in about two years. She could go to Hanna's, but the probability of Emily being there was way too high. She sighed, Thanksgiving this year was just going to be her, and a pizza. As Dear John came to an end, she heard obnoxious pounding on the door.

"That better not be that douche from down the hall." Alison muttered. Ever since her and Emily had moved in, their "neighbor" Scott had been totally inappropriate with them. He avidly made moves on both of the women, even though they continuously reminded him that they were in a monogamous relationship with each other. He was relentless, and he had gotten worse ever since Emily had moved out.

"I'm coming!" Alison bellowed as the insistent knocking grew louder. She fixed on her menacing glare as she tore open the door. Her eyes grew wide as they locked with chocolate orbs that she was certainly not expecting.

"Emily," Alison breathed out.

"Why have you been ignoring me?" Emily asked frown ever present on her voice.

Alison sucked in a hard breath as she tried to come up with an adequate answer.

"I, uh. I needed some space." She replied truthfully.

"I see," Emily sighed. Her suspicions were true. Alison didn't want anything to do with her anymore. She was too late.

"Yeah, with umm the store and doctor's appointments I've been pretty exhausted." Alison stuttered out.

"Why did you decide to bail on Hanna's dinner?"

"I told you, I needed space."

"From me?"

Alison gulped as she looked into Emily's eyes for the first time. They were filled with emotion, from what Alison could decipher it looked like sadness, anger and regret? Alison concentrated on Emily's eyes. She could understand the other two emotions, but regret? What did Emily have to regret? Probably kissing that hussy in broad daylight.

"I needed time to sort out my head." Alison replied still intrigued by Emily's eyes.

"So it is me?" Emily replied accusingly.

"Emily, you know I love you." Alison replied frustratedly. "I'm just taking your advice."

"Which was?"

"I'm not the most important person in my life anymore," Alison began. "I have another person to look out for." She finished gesturing to her stomach.

Emily glanced down to Alison's abdomen. Her stomach wtas clearly bigger since the last time she had saw her, which was only last week at their coffee date.  
"I understand." Emily replied solemnly. She was about to turn around when she suddenly stopped. "Ali, go to Hanna's for dinner tomorrow. I'm flying to Texas to meet my parents, so you don't have to avoid me anymore."

"I'm not avoiding you, Emily." Alison replied. That was the last thing she wanted, in all honesty.

"I'm just giving you your space." Emily replied with a sad smile. "Have a good Thanksgiving." With that last statement, the brunette turned on her heel and left the blonde standing in the doorway. Alison was left gaping. Emily practically came over and said that she forgave her, and she rejected her? What has gotten into her? It must be the hormones. She went back inside the apartment and settled on the couch. When Emily got back from Texas, they were going to have a serious talk.

* * *

The Liars sat around the table, minus Emily, along with their significant others and Zoe. They were enjoying Hanna's spread, although Spencer didn't want to admit it Hanna threw a great dinner party. Everything was perfect, except the gaping hole that Emily's absence left. There was always a slight lull in the conversation where Emily would've chimed in, and the cranberry sauce was left untouched because Emily was the _only _one who ate it. Alison pushed her plate around absently. It was her fault that Emily wasn't there, she had stupidly let her pride get the best of her, yet again. If she hadn't seen Emily kiss that woman, she would probably still be barking at her heels like a lost puppy. The conversation had died down, and Aria had noticed the awkward silence accumulate at the table, and she tried to stir up conversation.

"So these mashed potatoes are amazing, Han. What did you add?" She began.

"Emily made them." Alison cut in. "She puts garlic salt in them."

"Well, um what about this macaroni salad?" Spencer added trying to help Aria.

"Emily made that too." Alison answered sullenly.

"Okay, Ali! I've had enough of your negative Nancy act!" Hanna interjected.

The whole table went wide eyed as they processed Ali's words. Spencer kicked Toby from over the table to jump start him into action.

"Hey, uh let's go watch some football?" He suggested to the men as he started to leave the table.

"C'mon, Zoe. You too." Caleb started as he went to retrieve his daughter.

"No, Daddy! Its getting juicy!" The toddler whined as she was forcibly removed from the dining table.

"Juicy?" Spencer questioned as she recalled her niece's previous statement.

"We watch a lot of reality TV." Hanna answered nonchalantly.

"Alison, why were you avoiding Emily?" Aria asked softly.

"She's the one who should've been avoiding you." Spencer muttered under her breath.

Alison narrowed her eyes at her brunette friend. After all these years, they still clashed.

"I was jealous." Alison stated shyly. "I saw her kissing someone else at the Brew."

"Emily kissed Stephanie?" Hanna questioned. "She told me that date was horrible."

"You knew she was dating again?" Alison asked accusingly.

"We all did." Spencer shrugged as she started removing her plate.

"And you chose not to tell me because..?" Ali asked angrily.

"Because." Aria started. "She wasn't technically dating her. Well not willingly."

"Okay, I'm confused. Someone please fill me in." Alison demanded.

"Well a couple of weeks ago, she started having all of these _feelings _resurface about you." Hanna explained. "So we suggested that she date someone else before she made a decision."

"Who'd she pick?" Alison asked nervously.

"Who do you think?" Spencer replied sarcastically.

And suddenly everything made sense. Why Emily came over last night, why her eyes were filled with regret. Alison's face broke into a huge grin as she fished her phone out of her purse. She needed to call Emily and explain herself.

"Oh no, no, no." Hanna warned snatching her phone.

"What?" Alison replied annoyed.

"You can't call her." Aria chimed in.

"And why's that?"

"Because we weren't supposed to tell you anything." Spencer stated.

"Well you did." Alison stated impatiently as she reached for her phone.

"Nope. You can't call her until she gets back on Sunday." Hanna demanded.

"Sunday?!" Alison exclaimed. "You can't drop a bomb on me like that and expect me to keep quiet until Sunday!"

"That's exactly what we expect you to do." Spencer stated matter of factly.

"Its only three more days, Ali." Aria bargained softly.

"Fine." Alison agreed.

Three more days. She could do that.

Maybe.

* * *

**A/N: Hey, lovely people! Here's an update for ya! I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Holy balls you guys are amazing! Your reviews make me so happy. Here's an update for ya, I'm going to try and update a little more frequently.**

* * *

Alison sat behind the register of the boutique tapping a pen impatiently. She was incredibly nervous, Emily's plane was going to be landing in a mere seven hours and she was going to finally express her feelings to the brunette beauty. These last three days had been torture, her mind wandering to Emily whenever she was alone. The girls forced her into silence, making her brew in her own thoughts. She had been conjuring up scenarios, trying to imagine how Emily was going to react to her confession. Was she going to accept her back with open arms like Alison had hoped? Or reject her, sweetly telling her she was too late. She didn't know the outcome, but the girls have been hinting that Emily shares the same feelings as her, so she tried to remain optimistic. She glanced up at the clock, it was barely noon Emily's flight was supposed to come in at seven. If everything went well at the airport, she planned to whisk Emily away and take her to dinner at the little French place that she loved. It was going to be an amazing night, and hopefully she could start over with Emily and they could begin the rest of their lives. Together. Alison was getting lost in her thoughts when a jolt of pain broke her out of her dream like state. Alison's hand gripped the counter in pain, a cramp-like feeling ripped through her body. These pains have been occurring ever since she woke up this morning. Each hour becoming more painful. The pains were a little out of the ordinary, but she blamed it on the nerves of finally seeing Emily after all this time. As the pain passed she panted, trying to regain her composure. Hanna walked to the front of the store with a box of merchandise in her hand. She eyed the blonde warily and raised her eyebrow in concern.

"Are you okay?" Hanna asked. "You're looking a little flushed. Maybe you should rest, I'll pick up Em from the airport."

"No!" Alison interjected. "I'm gonna pick her up, I'm fine. Hanna, I promise." Hanna looked at her friend nervously. She was pale, sweating and she looked quite flushed. But, she knew how important meeting Emily was to Ali. And she might be a little apprehensive about their reunion, but she knew they made each other happy.

"Okay, Ali. Just promise me you'll call if something is wrong."

"I promise, Hanna." Alison replied sincerely.

"Okay." The shorter blonde agreed. "Just take the rest of the day off, okay? You've got a long night ahead of you and you need the rest."

Alison was about to disagree when she realized how good a nice nap and warm bath would do her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Sabrina is here. We can handle it." Hanna assured. Alison looked at her friend gratefully and decided that she was right. She's been feeling drained lately and she definitely didn't want to be tired tonight. Alison gathered her things and headed home. She had six and a half hours until she got to see Emily again. And she needed to be at her best.

* * *

Emily sat in the terminal of the Dallas International airport. She had a sweet holiday with her parents, and she was a little sad to leave them. She missed her parents, and living so far from them had never really had this much of an effect on her. Because she had Ali. Whenever she felt the slightest twinge of homesickness, or if she was worried about her Dad Alison would be there to hold her tight, and whisper sweet nothings in her ear to make her feel better. She sighed as she ran a hand through her hair. But she didn't have Alison anymore, and she didn't know if she would ever have her again. She pulled out her phone and dialed the number she knew by heart. The line rang a couple times until the person she was trying to reach answered.

"Em!" Aria greeted "When's your flight?"

"It leaves in about an hour." Emily replied. "I just called to see if you could pick me up at the airport? I really don't wanna catch a cab."

"Yeah, one of us will be there. Are you gonna be in Philly?"

"Yeah," Emily replied. "I'm at gate 13."

"Okay, sounds good." Aria replied. "I'll see you soon!"

"Alright, thanks Ar."

Emily hung up her phone and continued the wallow in her thoughts. If it was too late for her and Ali what was she going to do? Who would be there for her when she missed her Mom? Or when her Dad got deployed overseas? Who was going to be her rock? She had the other girls, and she knew that she would always have them. But it wasn't the same. The bond she had with Alison was much deeper, so much more intimate. She didn't know if she could find anything or anyone to replace that bond. Ever.

* * *

Alison groaned as she flopped down on her bed. She felt terrible. She was experiencing severe cramps in her lower abdomen, and her muscles were on fire. She had tried taking a nap, but the pain was so overwhelming. Alison took out her phone and groaned when she noticed the time. It was 5 o'clock and she was supposed to meet Emily in two hours. Her life couldn't get any worse, it amazed her sometimes how bad karma could come back and bite her in the ass. She got up from her bed and trudged to her bathroom. She ran the bath and poured in her relaxing bath salts. She removed her underwear, and noticed the blood that had accumulated on them. She had been worried when she had first noticed the blood, but google had assured her that spotting was normal during pregnancy. But this time, there was so much more blood. She ignored it, trying her hardest just to push through it. She was going to see Emily in less than two hours. She was going to tell her that she loved her, that she missed her so incredibly much. That she was so sorry for betraying her, that she would cherish her heart for the rest of her life if she gave her an opportunity to hold it again. Alison sighed as she sunk into the bath. She hoped that this bath would make her feel better. She closed her eyes and imagined Emily's eyes and smile. She heard her melodic laugh and smelt her intoxicating smell. She recalled her touch gliding along her skin, and the feel of her soft lips against her own. She sighed longingly, if she could only get passed this pain, she would be able to see Emily in the flesh. She would be able to wrap her arms around her and tell that she loved her, and would most likely never let go again. She leaned her head back on the tub and breathed deeply, hoping for a sense of relaxation to come over her. Her heart beat settled and she truly thought she was going to achieve her state of zen, when the most excruciating pain washed over her. She felt as if daggers were being dragged across her abdomen and lower back. This pain was by far the worst that she had experienced throughout her entire life. She arched her back, and wrapped her arms around her protruding belly protectively. Something was wrong, she had this ominous feeling that overcame her being. Her child was distressed, and she needed to do something because she couldn't imagine her baby experiencing the pain that she was currently feeling. She looked down at her bath water, and it was a crimson color which made her blood run cold. This was _definitely _not just spotting. Alison gripped the sides of the tub and used all of her strength to pull her body out of the water. She couldn't muster the energy to walk so she dragged her exhausted and bleeding body to her bedroom where her phone was located. Alison felt as if she was moving along the floor for days, the pain never stopping but gradually getting worse. She finally reached her phone and called the one person who was most likely to understand what she was going through. The phone rang about four times before she finally answered.

"Hey, Ali. What's up?" Hanna answered casually.

"There's so much blood, Han. So much, and it won't stop. It hurts so much." Alison rambled incoherently.

"Blood? Ali where are you? Are you okay?" Hanna asked worriedly.

"Somethings wrong. Hanna something is wrong and I have no idea what's happening." Alison sobbed hysterically.

"Alright, don't move. I'm calling 9-1-1. I'm on my way. Alison stay on the phone with me." Hanna ordered, her protective instincts kicking in. She turned to Sabrina and instructed her to call and send an ambulance to Alison's home. "Ali, are you still there?" She asked after a silent spell.

"It hurts, Han." Alison groaned on the other line.

"I know babe, help is on its way."

"What's happening to me?"

"I don't know Ali," Hanna stated somberly. "I wish I did."

Hanna continued to try and talk Alison through the pain, but it was unbearable. She heard distant sounds of sirens and she thanked God, or whoever sent them. She was so exhausted, she just needed to close her eyes and rest a bit. But before she could, Hanna burst through the door and kneeled by her side.

"There's so much blood," Hanna whispered. "Alison, open your eyes. You can't sleep. You've lost too much blood. Keep your eyes open! Please!"

Alison tried her best to do what Hanna asked, but the pain was white hot, and her head felt so heavy. She registered slightly as the paramedics came in and put her on a gurney. She felt when they loaded her into the ambulance, and when Hanna gripped her hand tighter than she ever had before.

"Ali, please. Stay awake." Hanna pleaded.

She tried. She tried with all her might just to keep her eyes open. But whenever she closed them, she saw a warm and comforting light. When her eyes closed, just for a second she saw Emily's deep brown and beautiful eyes. She saw her brilliant smile, and she felt comforted. She wanted to listen to Hanna, she really did. But she wanted to be able to see Emily, because in her heart that's where she wanted to be.

Alison closed her eyes.

* * *

Emily sat in the Philadelphia airport, alone. Her flight had landed almost two hours ago, and she was beginning to feel a little depressed that her friends had forgotten about her. She had tried calling all of them, but their was no answer. Caleb and Ezra didn't answer their phones either, and she knew Toby was on duty so his personal cell was in his locker. She contemplated catching a cab but the Eagles had a huge football match against the Jets, so the majority of the cab services were downtown shuttling people to and from the stadium. She pulled out her phone and tried calling the girls again. Something had to be wrong, they all had promised to always have their phones at hand because of the trauma they went through with the whole A debacle. It was just so unlike them. Emily got up from her seat and began to make her way to the crowd of people that were waiting for cabs. As she approached the mass of people she saw a familiar face exiting his vehicle. Toby, dressed in his full police uniform made his way to her with a somber expression on his face. Emily didn't noticed his facial expression, so she made her way towards him, relieved that she wouldn't have to be taking a cab home after all.

"They're two hours late, so the send a police escort. Typical Spencer." Emily muttered as she began to load her suitcase into the vehicle.

"Emily…" Toby began softly.

"No, its not your fault Toby. Aria probably forgot, didn't she? She's almost seven months along, and let me tell you she's becoming quite forgetful, the other day she forgot our coffee date. Like really? The coffee dates that we have been having for three years?"

"Emily." Toby cut off, in a much more demanding tone.

"Yeah?" She asked, now slightly concerned.

"The reason that none of the girls are here because something happened to-"

"To who? To Aria? Is the baby okay?" Emily asked worriedly.

"No, not to Aria." He began slowly. "To Alison."

Emily's eyes grew wide, and her heart began to thunder in her chest. To Alison? She had visited her four days ago and she seemed fine? What could have possibly happened?

"Is she… Is she okay? What happened?" Emily asked frantically.

"I don't know the details. Spencer barely debriefed me before sending me to pick you up." Toby began. "But I… I um, know its not too good."

Emily's heart stopped beating in her chest. Something had happened to Alison, she wasn't okay. Her heart sunk into her stomach, what if she never got to tell Alison she loved her ever again? Or touch her bronze skin, or kiss her soft lips. Tears began to flow freely down her cheeks.

"Toby, take me to her. Please." She begged. Toby ushered her into the car, and turned on his sirens and began to drive to the hospital. Emily's thoughts ran ramped, almost at the same speed as the car. What would she do if Alison wasn't okay? How could she survive?

* * *

Emily burst through the doors of the hospital and ran to the front desk.

"Alison Dilaurentis? Where is she?" She demanded.

"Emily."

She turned her head as she heard Spencer call her over. She made her way over to the group and Spencer gently put a hand on her shoulder. She explained the events that transpired over the weekend. She told her about Thanksgiving and about Alison's revelation. She told her about Ali's pain, and what ultimately landed her in the hospital. Emily's knees buckled when she heard the news. Alison did not deserve this. She sunk to the floor and cried. She cried for Alison, and for the physical pain she must've felt during this whole ordeal. She cried for the heartbreak Ali was going to suffer from once she regained consciousness. She cried for what could've been. She sobbed even harder when she felt Aria's baby bump against her back when her friend embraced her. She cried for the unborn baby girl who would never get a chance. After about thirty minutes of hysterical crying from the three brunettes on the floor of Rosewood Memorial Hospital, the crying finally subsided.

"Can I see her?" Emily asked, voice hoarse.

"Hanna's with her now. She's sedated, the doctor's said she'll be out until tomorrow." Spencer answered quietly, wiping away her own tears.

"She's in 21 E." Aria piped up. Guilt and pain evident in her voice.

Emily nodded at two of her oldest friends and made her way towards Alison's hospital room. The girls had warned her that she wasn't in the best shape, she didn't care. She had to see her and tell her that she loved her before it was too late. This scare had opened up her eyes wider than they had ever been before. Life is short, you can't waste time hating or being apart from someone you love. What if Alison had been hurt severely? What if there was no coming back for her? It would've destroyed her, worse than anything else had the power to do. Emily approached 21 E and opened the door quietly. Alison lay on the bed, sleeping. Her face was very peaceful, a drug induced sleep caused her not to stir much. Her golden skin was pale, and her normally shiny blonde hair seemed dull. Emily had to choke back a sob at the sight of her. Hanna rose to her feet as Emily entered the room. She walked up and embraced her fully, both women clinging to each other for physical and emotional support.

"She's gonna need you now more than ever, Em." Hanna said, voice laced with hard emotions.

"She's my only priority right now, Han." Emily answered through tears of her own. Hanna gave her one more tight squeeze before excusing herself. Today had been an emotional roller coaster for her as well. Emily walked over to Ali's bedside and sat down. Her eyes traveled the length of Alison's body. The usually bright and strong girl, looked weak and frail. The sight of her broke Emily's heart. She leaned up from the chair and left a long, lingering kiss on the blonde's forehead. She used her hand to stroke back some unruly hairs on Alison's head. She laced her fingers between the slightly cooler, paler ones. Emily rested her head on the bed, while stroking her thumb across Ali's knuckles.

"I love you, Alison Dilaurentis." She whispered softly. "And we're going to get through this. Together."

She continued to hold Ali's hand as she closed her eyes and sought out rest, vowing that she would do everything and anything in her power to get Alison through this.

* * *

**A/N: OMG. I HATE ME TOO. Tell me what you think!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hey beautiful people! Here's an update for ya! I hope you like it. **

* * *

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _Alison groaned as the incessant noise filled her ears. "Make it stop," she tried to croak out, but her throat was so parched she could only let out a hoarse cough. She tried to open her eyes, but they were _so _heavy. Her eyelids twitched, as she used all of her strength to open them. When she finally mustered enough strength to open her eyes she was met with stark white decor, and a strong hospital smell that reminded her of death filled her nostrils. She tried to move her hands, but one of them was weighed down by a warm limb. She turned her head to face her companion, who was none other than Emily Fields the woman who owned her entire heart. She smiled softly, whatever the reason why she was in the hospital Emily had made sure that she was by her side. Just as Alison was starting to think sweet thoughts about her girl, the memories of the previous day started to flood back in. She remembered the pain, the fatigue and the blood. There was so much blood. She started to panic, what exactly did it all mean? The blood? The pain? What went wrong? Was her baby okay? She started to move, she needed answers and she needed them now. She flexed her hand, trying to wake the brunette beside her. After a few futile attempts, the blonde finally mustered enough strength to shove the sleeping brunette awake.

"Ali? Are you awake?" Emily asked nervously. She immediately signaled the on call button, and a nurse made her way in after a few seconds. The entire time, the nurse was in the room Alison kept asking questions.

"What happened to me? Why am I here? Is my baby okay?" The blonde rambled. She looked towards Emily for an explanation. "Em?"

"Ali," Emily began but she cut herself off. How was she supposed to tell Alison what happened? How was she supposed to tell her this awful news? She couldn't.

"I'll, uh get the doctor." Emily trailed off in a panic.

"No." Alison said forcefully. "I trust you, just tell me."

Emily breathed in deeply. She could do this. She _had _to do this.

"Ali, uh. You.. You, uh lost it." Emily explained vaguely.

"Lost what?" Ali began slightly confused. And then everything started to make sense; the blood, the pain, the hospital. She covered her mouth with her palm, trying to stop the sob that ripped through her soul. Her baby was dead, she would never have the chance to live or experience any of the good things that life had to offer. She didn't even have a chance.

"Why?" She choked out hysterically.

"Its not your fault, Ali." Emily pleas, her voice raw with emotion as she tries to desperately convince the blonde. "Your baby had chromosome abnormalities." She explains gently. "It just means that your genes and its father's didn't match up correctly, its very common."

"I killed her." Alison whispers brokenly. "I didn't want her, and she knew it." The blonde's tears start to stream faster down her face. "She's dead and I killed her."

Emily reached up and wiped the tears from the other woman's face.

"Its not your fault, Alison. The doctor said that fifty percent of miscarriages are because of mismatched chromosomes." Emily said soothingly. "There was nothing you could've done."

"I could have wanted her." Alison sobbed. "I could have never resented her, I could have loved her."

"You did love her," Emily pleaded. "The reason why you're upset is because you lost someone you loved."

"I didn't get the chance to love her." Alison spit out. "I was too busy wanting you."

Emily swallowed as she screwed her eyes shut. This is exactly what she didn't want to happen. She didn't want Alison to blame anyone for this tragedy, it was the work of nature. But of course, knowing Alison she had to pass the blame on someone. And if the blonde wasn't wallowing in self deprecation, she knew that she would be the next target.

"Ali," Emily begins slowly. "This wasn't anybody's fault. Not yours, not mine, not God's. It was just mother nature doing what she does best." She finished in a soft, careful tone.

"Really, Emily?" Alison began with a sharp tongue. "My entire pregnancy I was stressed out about figuring out the best way to win you back. I wore myself thin, wondering, waiting and hoping. Do really think that was good for my baby?"

"I mean, no but-" Emily stammered.

"It wasn't. I was so preoccupied in trying to win you back that my baby died. She died and its because of you."

Emily's eyes widened at the accusation. She knew the blonde would be upset, but she didn't think that she would go as far as blaming her for the baby's death. It just wasn't fair. Emily sighed, she knew that there was no use in arguing with an emotionally distressed Alison. It would turn out badly, or worse than it already was.

As the words left Alison's mouth, she instantly regretted them. Logically, she knew that her baby's death wasn't Emily's fault. She remembered reading about mismatched chromosomes and how the process worked. She knew that sometimes things were just not meant to be. But, she couldn't help but let her irrational side blame Emily. It made her feel just a little less guilty.

"I'll just, uh, go. If that's how you feel." Emily said quietly as she rose to leave the room.

Alison looked down and started to pick at her bedspread. She couldn't look at Emily's sullen features and not become more guilty. She had to blame someone, and God knows she already hated herself for what had happened. Emily gave the blonde on the bed one last longing glance before quietly slipping out of the room. As soon as she heard the door click shut, Alison's emotions began their rampage. She kicked and screamed and thrashed about. She was just so angry. She was angry at the universe for taking away her child. She was mad at herself for treating Emily the way she did, because God knows she doesn't deserve it. She was angry for even letting that scumbag impregnate her. She was so incredibly mad that she would never get the chance to meet her little girl. Alison then felt a sharp pain rip through her abdomen, all of the angry convulsing was not ideal for her healing body. She hissed in pain, and longed for Emily to once again be by her side. She blindly reached towards her right, for the call button that resided there. She pressed it hurriedly, hoping that the nurse would pump more drugs into her system that would make her forget. Make her forget about her baby, the heartache, Emily. She wanted to forget everything. The nurse rushed in seconds later, attempting to console the clearly distressed girl. But she continued to thrash about carelessly, the anger once again running through her veins. The nurse called for back up, three other staff members rushing in to restrain her. The nurse finally entered a sedative into Alison's IV. As the medicine coursed through her veins, the blonde started to settle down. She limbs grew heavy and her eyelids drooped. Her mind became hazy and she drifted off into an unconscious bliss.

* * *

"Is she going to be okay?'

"I don't know, Emily said she was pretty upset, I guess that had to sedate her."

"How is Emily?"

"She tells me she's fine, but I know something happened in this room that she's not telling me."

Alison is woken from her unconscious bliss by a conversation that she was clearly the subject of. She opened her eyes, and sat up. Her body was substantially less sore than the previous day.

"Ali," Spencer called as she caught sight of the now awake blonde.

"Hey, Spence." Ali greeted weakly. She locked eyes with Hanna who was unusually quiet.

"How are you feeling?" Spencer questioned, concerned.

"Better than yesterday, that's for sure." She answered honestly.

The three girls sat in relative silence for the next few minutes, at a loss about what to say to each other. Spencer, being that natural leader in the group to the reins of the conversation.

"Ali, you're getting discharged this afternoon." She explained. "Are you going to be okay going home alone? Or do you want to come home with one of us?"

Alison looked at the two in front of her, she supposed that they were the two most logical options. Seeing Aria beautifully pregnant would be too much to handle. And Emily, was currently living with Hanna. Wait, she couldn't face the brunette especially after what she had accused her of. And living with Spencer wouldn't be much better, Toby still resented her for the affair she had with his partner. Apparently he was stuck with a rookie who almost got himself killed on the first day of the job. And her and Spencer always butted heads, despite the circumstances. But her apartment would be too overwhelming, she would just relive that horrible afternoon over and over until she drove herself crazy. She _couldn't _go back to her apartment. Not yet. She didn't even know if the blood was cleaned up, she was too emotionally frail to handle that.

"What about Emily?" She questioned, directing the statement at Hanna.

"She's staying with Aria for now. She's uh, looking for a new apartment." Hanna answered lowly. She pursed her lips, like she was going to say something but she swallowed the thought.

"Can I uh, stay with you Han?" Alison asked sheepishly. "I just _can't _go back to my apartment yet. I mean, there was so much blood and I don't even know if its still there. I just can't."

"Emily cleaned it up." Hanna said suddenly, interrupting her rant. "She came home from the hospital after sitting at your bed side for thirty-six hours, packed a bag telling me she was going to move out and find her own said she was going to search for a place while staying at Aria's. Before she left she raided my garage for bleach and cleaning supplies." Hanna trailed off. Hanna collected herself before beginning again. "She tried to hold it all in, but I know Emily. Something was bothering her, I could see it in her eyes. What did you do, Ali?"

"Hanna," Spencer warned seeing the look of challenge in the blonde's eyes.

"No, Spence." Hanna declared. "Ali you know I love you, and I know you're going through a tragedy right now, but did you really have to hurt Emily in the process? She never did anything wrong! She was just trying to help, that was all she was ever trying to do."

"I know, Han. I do. I'm going to make it right with Emily, I am. But I have to fix myself first. I am so broken, more broken than I was in high school. And me being broken isn't helping Emily at all, its hurting her." Alison finished, her voice raw with emotion.

"Do you promise?" Hanna asked tears now clear in her eyes.

"I promise, Han. Its not over between me and Emily. I know that, and I'm pretty sure she knows that, too." Alison finished with a watery smile. She hoped to God that Emily knew that too.

* * *

"Emily?" Aria called as she made her way into the guest room of her home. She was carrying the herbal tea that she swore by. Emily looked up at her friend from her seat on the bed. She had been lost in her thoughts all day. Did she really kill Alison's baby? Was it her fault? Well, Alison would have never gotten pregnant if she didn't cheat that night. But, she wouldn't have left if Emily hadn't brought up the most sensitive topic to the blonde. It frustrated her, Alison and her words always had the ability to cut her deeply. She thought that it had gotten better over time, but she was wrong. With one lash from the whip like tongue, Emily was hurt and wounded. It was her weakness, and it killed her. Aria sat gently on the bed, and handed Emily a mug, who accepted it with a grateful smile. The two friends sat in a comfortable silence enjoying their tea and each other's company. Emily finished hers and sat her mug down gently before throwing herself into Aria's embrace. The tanned brunette cried for what seemed like hours, but in reality it was only ten minutes.

"Why does she do this to me?" Emily asked desperately. "I don't deserve this."

"I know you don't, Em." Aria cooed while running her hand through Emily's hair. "She's hurt right now, she had to place the blame on someone."

"I know, but why me?" Emily cried hysterically. "I haven't done anything wrong."

"I don't know, Em." Aria replied quietly.

The two sat together for a while longer, Emily's tears still flowing freely Aria's hand still combing through her hair.

"I need to leave, Aria." Emily said quietly.

"What? Em, you can't. You have work and us, you can't just leave." Aria said, her voice panicked.

"Not now, necessarily." Emily replied as she slipped her hand into Aria's squeezing it firmly. "For Christmas break I'm gonna fly to Texas and see my parents. Maybe I'll look for a job there for next year, and a place. I don't know, I just need a break from Rosewood for awhile." She confessed.

"Whatever you need to get better, Em." Aria replied softly. "We'll miss you."

"I'll miss you guys too." Emily replied lovingly. "And don't worry, I'll still be here for mini Ezra's birth."

Aria laughed, and continued to sit there with Emily. She would miss her, but if leaving was what was best for her, she wouldn't stop her. She just hoped that her other friend's would understand the swimmer's decision. Especially Hanna. And Alison.

* * *

**A/N: Short but sweet! Let me know what you think! I'm sorry updates have been so far apart, but school has been insane, and I have midterms coming up so I've been studying like crazy! I hope you like it!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: What is this? Is this an update? And it hasn't been a half a month? Thank you so much for sticking with me with this story, but sadly its wrapping up soon. There should be a few more chapters and then an epilogue. Hope you like it! **

* * *

Alison walked into the front door of her beloved boutique. She hadn't been to work in over two weeks, and she needed to go back. She was tired of feeling bad for herself and wallowing in her own pity. She had come to the conclusion that even if she wanted it to end up differently, everything happens for a reason. And she can't go back in time and make sure anything turned out differently, it was just impossible.

"Ali?" Hanna asked worriedly as she walked through the door. "I didn't know you were coming in today?"

"You've been in charge for too long, Marin." Alison joked. "I was afraid that you might have burned down the place."

Hanna raised her eyebrow and smirked at her friend. She was relieved that Alison was in her teasing mode again, she was on the right track to becoming her old self again. This made the blonde happy.

"Pssh, we've been doing great without you Ali." Hanna teased right back. "Sales have gone up by 4%, I think it was because customers weren't greeted by your ugly mug."

Alison let out a genuine laugh and smiled at her friend. She was so thankful for Hanna, the blonde had no idea what their friendship meant to her.

"How have you been, Han?" Alison asked in a more serious tone. Even though the blonde duo had been living together, they hadn't communicated much in the last two weeks.

"I'm doing okay," Hanna began. "Missing Em a little though."

Alison looked down after Hanna uttered her confession. She knew it was her fault that Emily hadn't been around as much as Hanna wanted her to be. The two of them went from living together, to barely speaking the last two weeks. She knew how much it was killing the blonde, and she wanted to fix it, she needed to fix it. For Hanna, and for herself.

"I'm sorry, Han." Alison apologized. "I'm going to make it right, and soon."

"There's no need to rush into anything you're not ready for." Hanna reminded her gently.

"I know, I'm ready Han." Alison declared. "I'm more than ready."

These past two weeks, Alison had thought more about her relationship with Emily. She had come to the realizations that even though these last months have been nothing but pure hell, she wouldn't want to go through hell with anyone else besides Emily. And she missed her; she missed her warm smile, her sweet laugh, her soft lips and her gentle touch. _God, _she missed Emily so much that sometimes it drove her insane.

"I hope you're right, Ali." Hanna replied. "Alright, you slacker. You've played hooky enough. Let's get to work." Hanna playfully chastised as she made her way towards the back room of the store. Alison laughed as she followed her friend. She hoped that she was right as well.

* * *

"Okay, guys this study guide will tell you all that you need to know for the final." Emily explained as she handed out a packet of papers to her class.

"What if we don't take the final?" A student asked from the back of the classroom.

"Then you can count on retaking this class next year." Emily replied. "But you better study hard, Brian. You've already been with me for two years. I think you're running out of time, don't you think?" This comment earned a snicker from her class.

"I know I won't see you again until test day, but I expect you to know the material. There will be no questions on the day of the test, so if you have any questions ask them now."

"What chapters of the book should we study?"

"That's a great question, chapters 1-7 with an emphasis on the formulas. Anyone else?" As Emily ended her sentence the bell rang and the students started to exit the classroom.

"You can always e-mail me if you have any other questions!" Emily called after them. As the last student exited the building, Emily sat at her desk and pulled out her phone. Her day had been a long one, and she was so grateful that it was over. Christmas break was in three days and she felt even more anxious than her students. She needed a break from Rosewood, she needed to clear her head and make some rational decisions about her life. She knows she told Aria that she wanted to move to Texas, but she was starting to reconsider. Because after everything, Rosewood was still her home and it wouldn't feel right leaving it. She loved her parents and everything, but there was a reason that she didn't follow them to Texas. She had her own life, and her own friends. She couldn't leave them behind. Emily noticed that she had six unread text messages.

**Hanna: 10:42 am**

_Emily, where will you be spending Christmas? I know that Ezra and Aria are going to see her Mom in the city! Text me back, you jerk. _

Emily sighed, she wasn't really ignoring Hanna. She just wasn't in the mood to answer all of her best friend's questions.

**Aria: 12:22 pm**

_Hey, Em. I'm sorry I wasn't able to make lunch. I had a doctors appointment. 4 more weeks and this sucker is out! I'll see you at home. _

She smiled as she read Aria's message. Aria was due in January, and her mini friend was overwhelmed with nerves and excitement with her due date fast approaching. Emily couldn't wait to meet her little nephew.

**Mom: 1 pm**

_I can't wait until you get here honey! Dad has decorated the house just like you used to do in high school. Are you sure Alison can't make it? I thought you said you two were getting back together? Let me know when your flight is supposed to land, so we can meet you at the airport. Love you! _

Emily huffed. Explaining the past two weeks to her mother was going to be so much fun.

**Hanna: 1:17 pm **

_Emily. I know this is your free period text me back. _

**Spencer: 2:02 pm **

_How have you been? It feels like I haven't spoken to you in ages. We should get coffee this week? Maybe, if you're up for it. _

She didn't know why she hadn't spoken to Spencer in so long, she might have to take her up on that cup of coffee.

**Hanna: 3 pm **

_I know you're out of class. If I don't get a reply in five minutes, I'm calling you. _

Emily looked down at her phone and noticed that it was exactly 3:05. Before she had a chance to reply, her phone vibrated violently, and Hanna's name and contact picture flashed before her eyes.

"Hello?" She answered sheepishly.

"Why have you been ignoring me, Miss Fields." Hanna asked accusingly.

"I'm not, I swear. My phone has been stashed away all day. Finals are coming up and I've been busy with students." Emily assured.

"I miss you." Hanna said quietly after a beat of silence.

"I miss you, too Marin." Emily said affectionately.

"So, answer my question. Where will you be spending Christmas?"

"I'm going to Texas."

"Again?!" Hanna asked in disbelief. "It feels like you just came back."

"Its not like I have anyone here to celebrate it with." Emily retorted bitterly.

A moment passed before the blonde spoke up again.

"You have me. You know that."

"I know, but you have your family. Christmas is where you make memories with your family, especially since Zoe is so young. I wouldn't want to intrude on that." Emily replied.

"You're never an intrusion."

"I know, but I'm still going to Texas Han." Emily answered her response being an end to their argument.

"Well fine," Hanna relented. "Can I at least see you before you go? When do you leave?"

"I leave Friday at 1pm. My flight is at 3pm."

"Who's driving you?"

"Ezra and Aria. They have to pick something up for the baby in Philly, so they're just going to drop me off." Emily answered.

"Then tonight. You and I will have dinner. We have some catching up to do." Hanna declared.

"Okay, I'm in sergeant." Emily joked.

"7pm. The grille. Don't be late." Hanna commanded as she hung up the phone.

Emily chuckled as she tossed her phone into her purse. She grabbed her keys and locked up her classroom. She was going try to get a nap in before she would have to deal with Hanna Marin and her never ending questions.

* * *

"Thanks for shopping with us, have a good evening." Alison bid the customer farewell as she finished ringing up their purchase. She had endured a long but entertaining day at the office. She had enjoyed the easy banter with Hanna, and she talked with Sabrina about her studies and how they were coming along. Hanna came out of the back room with her coat and scarf on. She flipped off the neon sign and turned to Alison.

"Are you okay to close? Sabrina's here to help." The shorter blonde asked.

"Yeah, I've got it." Alison replied. "Where are you headed?"

"I'm meeting Em for dinner." Hanna replied shyly. She didn't know Ali would react.

"Is everything okay?" Alison asked slightly worried.

"We're just catching up." Hanna assured. "I'll see you at home."

The smaller blonde wrapped her coat around her body and made her way into the harsh Pennsylvania winter. Alison wondered why Emily had been so distant lately. Sure, she understood that she had said harsh things to her at the hospital, but why was she ignoring Hanna? For as long as she's known the two, they never had to "catch up". They knew absolutely everything about each other. Which is why this dinner was so strange to her. Maybe Emily was breaking some horrible news to her blonde best friend. Maybe she needed advice. Advice about her? What if Emily was going to tell Hanna that she was really done with her? The not knowing was driving her insane.

* * *

Emily walked into the grille at 7:05 pm. Hanna was going to kill her. She had taken a nap and over slept just a little bit. But those ten minutes she lost out on proved to be her downfall. She was five minutes late and she knew Hanna would find a way to punish her. She spotted her friend sitting at a secluded booth in the corner of the restaurant.

"Sorry I'm late, Han. You know how I hate driving in the snow." Emily explained as she sat down.

"You've been driving in the snow you're whole life, Em. You would think you'd master that skill by now." Hanna teased.

Emily let out the breath she was holding as she laughed at Hanna's dig. At least she wasn't going to hold it over her head that she was late. Just as Emily finished her thought Hanna spoke up.

"Oh, you're not off the hook for being late, Fields." Hanna reminded her as she took a sip of her water. Emily rolled her eyes. She should've known, Hanna was so very observant.

"So why'd you bring me here?" Emily questioned. "Did you miss my gorgeous face?"

"Yes," Hanna deadpanned. "And I want to know how you're holding up."

Emily took a deep breath before answering Hanna. She didn't know how she was really feeling. She did go through a lot two weeks ago, but was it really her tragedy to grieve?

"I'm okay, Han." Emily replied semi-truthfully. "But I do feel like I need a break."

"From?" Hanna prompted.

"From the emotional rollercoaster that is Alison Dilaurentis." Emily said exasperatedly. "She cheats on me, gets pregnant, loses the baby and then blames it on me." Emily took a deep breath and looked up to meet Hanna's eyes. "I just don't understand why she continues to hurt me so much. I mean, I forgave her for the cheating, but this? Blaming her baby's death on me, I think its too much." She finishes in a much softer, more broken tone.

"She doesn't mean it, Em." Hanna said softly she took the brunette's hand. "She was broken, but she's healing. She's getting better."

"Yeah, but she broke me in the process." Emily replied bitterly.

"It takes a lot more than words to break you Emily Fields." Hanna replied confidently. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for." She finished as she gave Emily a reassuring smile. Emily returned the gesture gratefully. She was so thankful for her best friend. She loved Spencer and Aria with her whole heart, but Hanna just connected with her on a deeper level.

"Thanks, Han." Emily smiled. "So, how's life in the Rivers-Marin household?" Hanna laughed as she started telling Emily about how angry she was when she found Caleb and Zoe in the kitchen doing "science experiments" together in her kitchen. Emily laughed at the tale, and realized that this was why she couldn't leave Rosewood. Her family was here.

* * *

Emily sat in the back seat of Ezra's Honda Civic. She was on her way to the airport after three days of stressful finals. She was pretty confident that her student did well on the exam. She had practically spoon fed them the answers with that study guide. She just hoped that they were smart enough to actually use it.

"So, Emily," Ezra starts awkwardly. "Are you excited to see your parents?" Emily smiles at his attempt to start a conversation.

"Its always nice to see my parents." Emily replies. "But I spent Thanksgiving with them, so its not going to be such a dramatic reunion."

"Em, we can stay in Rosewood if you want." Aria replied hurriedly. "My mom can come down and see us; you don't have to go to Texas." With Aria's due date being so close, her hormones were running rampant and she had mini breakdowns frequently.

"I just don't want you to move." Aria cried. "I'm going to be a Mom soon, and I need my best friends with me. All of them."

"I'll be there when Jr.'s born, Ar." Emily assured trying to console her petite friend.

"But I want you to be there his whole life!" Aria exclaimed. "You can't do that in Texas."

"Aria, I promise that I'll be in your baby's life." Emily said gently. "I'm just going for Christmas; I promise I won't make any rash decisions until I talk to you first, okay?"

Aria nodded in response at Emily's words. She had contemplated on telling Aria that she wasn't going to move, but she decided that her hormonal friend couldn't take much more emotional turmoil.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked as they pulled up to the airport.

"Yeah," Aria answered quietly.

"I'll talk to you soon," Emily promised as she exited the vehicle with her luggage. She dropped it on the curb and made her way to the passenger side. "I love you, Ar."

"I love you, too Em." Aria responded with a watery smile. "Call me when you land."

"Will do." Emily agreed as she hugged her friend. She stepped back and claimed her bags as she headed towards her gate.

* * *

Alison sat in the brew with her three best friends. They had just gone to the mall and did some last minute Christmas shopping. The holiday was two days away, and they all missed the fifth member of their group profoundly.

"Has anyone heard from Em?" Alison asked casually. The brunette had been in Texas for two days and she had absolutely no updates on her well being. She supposed that she didn't really _deserve _an update. But it was driving her crazy not knowing.

"She sent a picture of her and her parents ice skating this morning." Spencer replied as she took out her phone to show the blonde. Alison grasped the phone and stared at the picture and a small smile rose to her face. The gorgeous brunette was holding the phone with her out stretched hand while her parents stood closely behind her. The tanned family all shared similar smiles and rosy cheeks as they enjoyed their day on the ice.

"It looks like they're having fun," Ali commented as she gave the phone back to Spencer. If the circumstances were different, Alison would have been in that picture, her slightly smaller body would have curled perfectly against Emily's as she took the picture. If only.

"Yeah," Aria muttered. "Probably a little too much fun."

"What do you mean, Aria?" Hanna questioned.

"I mean Emily's having too much fun in Texas." Aria said lowly, clearly upset about the topic.

"Let her have fun," Spencer began "She rarely gets to see her parents."

"Well she's gonna see them more very soon." Aria said dryly.

"What are you trying to say?" Spencer asked, confused.

"I'm trying to say that Emily is going to move to Texas!" The pregnant brunette exclaimed. "She's not just down there for Christmas; she's going to look for an apartment and a new job while she's there."

The other women at the table were in complete shock. Alison felt like she couldn't breathe. Emily was going to move. To Texas. Which was 2,000 miles away. Emily couldn't move; she just couldn't. She was _in love _with her. She couldn't live without her.

"How do you know this, Aria?" Spencer asked the first to recover from the shock.

"She told me two weeks ago." Aria answered her voice thick with emotion. "She said she needed a break from Rosewood."

"She is not moving." Hanna declared after a beat. "She would've told me. She tells me _everything._"

"She didn't tell you this, Han. She was afraid of your reaction." Aria said quietly.

Alison felt as if her world was caving in around her. Emily was leaving. She was leaving because she needed a break from _her _and it made her sick. She couldn't breathe.

"We have to do something." Alison finally choked out. "She can't leave, Emily can't move. She just can't. Her whole life is here, her job, her friends." Alison trailed off as she wiped away a tear that made its way down her face. "I'm here."

"I have to call her." Hanna declared as she pulled out her phone.

"Wait." Ali said as she reached out and grabbed her wrist. "I have a better idea."

* * *

**A/N: Oh, Aria and your raging hormones. What have you done? Haha Tell me what you think!?**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Life has been super hectic! I have no excuses, I hope you enjoy. **

* * *

Spending Christmas in Texas was not as bad as Emily originally anticipated. Besides her mother's endless questions, her father's awkward attempts at changing the subject and the fact that she was severely missing Rosewood; it wasn't _that _bad. She was currently sitting in her father's recliner, with a mug of hot cocoa on her lap. Her parents were cuddled together on the love seat, whispering quietly while trying to keep their eyes on the screen. _It's a Wonderful Life_ was currently playing on the screen and Emily couldn't help but feel lonely. She was surrounded by the people that were supposed to make her feel the most at home, but she couldn't help but feel like an outsider. Her parents had built themselves a sweet, comfortable life and although she would always be their baby, she didn't belong with them anymore. She belonged in Rosewood, with her friends, with her _family. _She had only been in Texas for a total of three days and she longed for the little things. She would do anything to hear Aria's laugh, have a heart to heart with Spencer, watch countless reruns with Hanna or see Ali's smile. Emily chuckled quietly to herself, she was so glad that she decided not to move she couldn't imagine her life without those four girls that have been her everything for over a decade. Emily wrapped her blanket tighter around her body, she had three more days with her parents, and then she would be returning back home. Back to her girls. The movie is coming to an end, as George Bailey is running through town rejoicing because he is alive, there is an incessant pounding at the door. Emily's father looked towards the door curiously, it was 10pm on Christmas day. Who could possibly be at the door? He walked over to the door, and peeked his head outside. Emily heard quiet murmurings, but didn't pay attention to the conversation. It was probably some charity soliciting money for the homeless or something or the other. Emily pulled out her phone and checked her messages. All of the girls had sent her a 'Merry Christmas' message. Hanna's came along with a picture of Zoe with her favorite Christmas present, a two month old golden retriever puppy that Emily had ordered from the finest kettle in Pennsylvania. Emily had been trying to convince Hanna and Caleb that they could handle a dog for months. Caleb was all for it, but Hanna was a tad bit harder to convince. She did not want to take on the responsibility of caring for an animal, but she eventually caved. The puppy was supposed to be delivered on Christmas morning, and according to the picture the plan went smoothly. As Emily was gazing at the picture, her father came up to her and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Em," he began, "there's someone at the door for you."

Emily got up and made her towards the door. Who could be at her parent's door step wanting her on Christmas day? She approached the door, she took a deep breath. There was only one person that she hoped was on the other side of the door. But the probability that her wish would come true was highly unlikely. She pulled slowly on the handle, the barrier between herself and the unknown visitor slowly swinging open. As she came face to face with the other person, she let out a breath of utmost relief.

* * *

"Alison, are you sure that you want to do this?" Hanna asked worriedly as the taller blonde began loading her car with various supplies. "I mean, tomorrow is Christmas Eve you shouldn't be going on a road trip to Texas right now. Especially by yourself."

"You're right." Alison agreed as she finished putting the last bag into the car. She closed the trunk with a soft thud. "I should have left hours ago, after we had coffee. If I'm lucky, I'll get there before Christmas day is over."

"Emily is coming back, Ali." Spencer reminder her as she held onto an upset Aria. The pregnant brunette was still emotionally unstable, and she felt a little guilty for blabbing Emily's secret.

"I know," Alison assured as she made her way towards her friends. "I've made some pretty bad mistakes these past few months. I've messed up so badly and I have kept Emily at bay for long enough. I already think that I might be too late, but I can't sit here and wait for her to come back. I need to go to her, before I lose her forever."

Alison stepped into her three closest friends' embrace. They understood why she had to go, and they supported her and Emily's relationship.

"Just be careful, okay?" Spencer, the ever responsible reminded her. "Don't drive 24 hours straight."

"I promise I won't." Alison agreed.

"Call us when you get there." Aria demanded as she spoke up for the first time.

"I will."

"And tell Emily that I'm going to kick her ass when she gets back." Hanna replied half serious.

"Oh, don't worry Han. I hope she doesn't think that she was going to pack up and leave us without any repercussions." Ali replied with a laugh.

Alison gave her friends one last squeeze before getting into her car and starting up the engine. She wanted to drive at least ten hours before taking a break. She navigated easily through her hometown, she had easily memorized every road, building and corner by the time she was fifteen. Once she reaches the highway her mind starts to wander. What would she do if Emily was seriously done with her? She had seriously screwed up, and wouldn't blame her if she was. But she had decided long ago that she wasn't going to just stand by and let Emily slip through her fingers once again. She was going to win Emily back. It was just the _how _that she had to work out.

"Well," Alison said to no one in particular. "I've got ten hours to figure it out."

* * *

Alison pulled into the parking lot of a small coffee shop somewhere in the middle of Tennessee. She had been driving for a total of 11 hours straight and she needed a break. She had been looking for a place to stop for a few miles. She saw that this coffee shop was open for 24 hours. Her plan was to consume an unhealthy amount of caffeine and take a small nap before getting back on the road. She exited her vehicle and stretched her tight muscles. She had ignored her body's pleas for a break, her determination to reach Emily completely over riding everything else. Alison slowly made her way towards the front of the shop; she had hoped that they served a good espresso. The bell dinged as she walked through the door, a man with gray hair and a sweet southern accent stood behind the counter.

"Welcome to Suzanna's!" He greeted cheerfully. "What can I get for a pretty lady like yourself?"

"Give me the strongest cup of coffee you have, please." Alison said tiredly. "I still have a long drive ahead of me."

"Coming right up." He responded with a smile as he began to prepare Alison's coffee. "If you don't mind me asking, where are you headed darlin'?"

"Texas." Alison replied as she waited for her coffee.

"On Christmas day?" The man asked surprised as he handed her a mug. "You still have a ten hour trek."

"I know." Alison sighed as she took a sip of the coffee. It wasn't the best cup that she's ever had, but it had a unique taste to it. "What kind of beans do you use?" She asked curiously.

"These beans are grown in Georgia and slow roasted to perfection." He answered proudly. "But the creamer may have just a small pinch of Tennessee's finest bourbon."

Alison took another sip and savored it for a few moments. As the flavors resonated in her mouth she could make out the distinct taste of bourbon.

"Alcoholic coffee," Alison began amused. "You would think that we're in Ireland."

The shop owner laughed sincerely as he grabbed the pot and refilled her mug.

"So what's a little lady like you driving to Texas all alone on Christmas day?" He asked genuinely intrigued.

"I'm going to win back my girl." Alison admitted honestly.

The blonde braced herself for his reaction. She was in the South after all, and she knew they weren't as liberal as they were on the East coast.

"Don't worry darlin', I'm not a backwards old hick." He laughed as he turned around and grabbed a picture that was resting by the cash register. He handed it to Alison looked at the photo and saw the shop owner with his arms around a much younger man who was holding hands with another man. They were all dressed formally, and there were several other people in the photo, it looked like a wedding party.

"That's my son Joshua and his husband David." The man beamed proudly. "They got married five years ago; it was one of the happiest days of my life." He reached into his pocket and fished out his wallet, he pulled out another smaller photo. It was the same two men from the previous photo, cradling a small, Hispanic baby. "They adopted the cutest Guatemalan boy a few months ago, they named him after me; Samuel."

"Well Samuel, your family is beautiful." Alison complimented as she handed him back the pictures.

"Why, thank you." He said with a smile. "I just wish that Suzanna was still around to see it." He trailed off quietly. After a beat of silence, Samuel spoke up again.

"Look, sweetheart I know you don't want to hear an old geezer's advice, but here's something you should know about loving a woman." He took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes before speaking again. "Savor the time you have with her, because the reality is she won't be with you forever."

"What happened to Suzanna?" Alison asked quietly.

"We had thirty-five good years." He began softly. "Those years were the greatest of my entire life. After the kids moved out we lived comfortably, we saved up our extra money and put it into our 'coffee house' fund. You see, it was always Suzanna's dream to own a coffee place. We saved for ten years, almost every penny. And finally we came across this place; it used to be a bakery so most of the appliances were still applicable. We ran this place together for eight years, before the cancer came along. My old girl fought hard, she really did. Battled that damn disease for a year and a half, but her poor body couldn't keep up with her determined soul. She lost the war two years ago."

Alison wiped away the stray tears that escaped while Samuel told his tragic tale. The love of his life died. She was gone forever, and the poor man missed her every single day. The love of her life was perfectly healthy; she just wasted precious time with her because she was an idiot.

"Don't cry darlin'," Samuel cooed as he handed Alison a napkin. "Mine and Suzanna's love was real, bright and magical. Nothing to be sad about. All I'm trying to tell you is life is unexpected; you never know when God is going to take away the ones you love. That's why we have to cherish the time that we have now, in the present. That way, when you're old and wrinkly like me you'll have a lifetime of memories in your brain that you'll treasure forever."

Alison and Samuel talked for awhile longer before Alison excused herself so she could get back to her travels. Samuel sent her away with a thermos full of his specialty coffee. As Alison pulled out of her parking space, she heard Samuel call out to her:

"Go get your Suzanna!"

Now _that _sounded like a good plan.

* * *

Alison pulled up to the Field's residence at about 10 pm on Christmas day. After almost twenty four hours of driving she was exhausted. But her task wasn't complete. She still had to see Emily, and attempt to sway her with her words. She took one last drag of Samuel's coffee before exiting her car. She pulled her coat around her body a little tighter and walked cautiously up to the door. She knocked forcefully, a sudden spur of confidence raging through her blood. But as she stood and waited for the door to open, her nerves got the best of her. Her brain started to do back flips. What if Emily slammed the door in her face? What if she laughed at the pathetic blonde groveling back to her? What if, What if? These questions wracked her brain until the door finally swung open. The breath that Alison had been holding was let out nervously as the only male Fields greeted her.

"Alison?" He murmured, slightly confused. "What are you doing here? Is Emily expecting you?"

"No!" Alison said a little too excitedly. "No," she began again a little more collectively. "She doesn't know I'm here. It was kind of a spontaneous decision."

"How did you get here?" He asked curiously.

"I drove."

"From Rosewood?" He asked in disbelief.

"Yes. I, uh, needed some time to think." Alison replied shyly.

Mr. Fields eyed her suspiciously. This girl had seriously driven all the way from Pennsylvania to be with his daughter, he didn't doubt her love. He was just a little wary of the way she held his Emily's heart.

"Well, I'll go get her." He said as he turned around. "Alison, be careful with my baby girl. I know you love her as much, or even more then any man could. I just need you to be more careful with her heart."

"I promise, Mr. Fields that if I fix this Emily's heart will never be shattered ever again when it comes to me. And that's a promise." Alison breathed out.

The tanned man smiled at her and nodded his head before turning on his heel to fetch his daughter. Alison fidgeted slightly. In a matter of seconds, she was going to be face to face with the love of her life and she was going to be begging for her forgiveness.

"Well here goes nothing." Ali muttered into the night as she heard footsteps approaching. The door slowly swung open revealing the most beautiful creature that Alison had ever laid eyes upon. Emily stood standing in a pair of cheesy Christmas pajamas with her hair tousled in messy perfection. She let out a deep sigh as she took in the blonde.

"Ali?" She asked confused. "What are you doing here? In Texas. On Christmas?"

"I came to see you." Alison said softly as her bright blues locked with a deep chocolate.

"I'm coming back in three days." Emily replied.

"It couldn't wait." Alison said fiercely as she stepped closer to the blonde. "I needed to tell you how I feel before you move to Texas."

"Wait, did Aria tell you that?" Emily interrupted.

"Yeah, but it doesn't matter." Alison declared. "I have been wanting to tell you this for the past few months. It's about time you know."

Alison took a deep breath before looking into her favorite pair of eyes, and she began to spill her soul.

"Emily, I love you. I've loved you practically my whole life. And I know I have hurt you so much in the past, and it kills me to know that I have brought you so much pain. But the times where I don't screw up monumentally, we're happy. I have spent the best years of my life with you Emily Fields and I want to spend many, many more with you. It's just sometimes I get insecure and I don't handle my issues in the correct way, and that led me to commit the biggest mistake of my life. I despised myself for months, there are still days that I hate myself for cheating on you. You were everything that was good in my life, and I had thought that I had lost you forever. And I tried so hard to win you back, but I couldn't because I betrayed you so badly. Those first couple of months were the worst months that I had ever lived. My mind kept telling me that I had fucked up so badly that I will never be able to call you mine again. But in my heart, there was a part that kept me propelling me forward. My heart longed for you so badly that I would do anything and everything just to have you back."

My hope started to dwindle as the weeks went by with no contact from you, but on Spencer's anniversary when you punched that sleeze bag for me, my heart swelled with joy. The hope ripped throughout my body and burned like an open flame. We talked and we cuddled that night and I had so much hope. But then I saw you on a date with that other woman and my heart just broke. That's when I started to focus on the baby, so my mind wouldn't be consumed by thoughts of you all the time. And I got so attached to the baby, I really did love her. And on Thanksgiving when the girls told me that you still had feelings for me, my excitement went to a whole other level. Thoughts of you, me and the baby girl filled my head and I longed for it. I wished that you and I could have raised her together. But when she died, this immense guilt flooded over me. I blamed myself for losing her, there had to be something that I could've done differently to save her life. And I am so incredibly sorry for blaming you; I had no right to do that. And you have to believe me, Em. The rational side of me always knew that no one was to blame, especially not you. But the guilt was so powerful that I felt like I had to punish myself. And one of the best ways to make me unhappy is to keep me away from you. I know it's sick and twisted, but I hurt you in order to punish myself."

And I know this apology might seem impromptu or rushed but I mean every single word of it. I am so sorry for not cherishing you, Emily. And I know I have no right to ask you for another chance, but you're all I've ever wanted, and you're all I'll ever need. And Hanna wanted to tell you that you couldn't move to Texas, but if you do I just want to let you know that I'll move here too. Because wherever you are, that's where I want to be."

Alison finished her monologue with a deep breath and locked eyes with Emily the two women stayed silent for a few moments before the brunette spoke up.

"Ali, you really hurt me this last time." She said shakily. "I don't know if I could take heartache from you."

"Em, I know that I hurt you. And I hate myself for it. But I promise I'll be better, I'm not broken anymore. I'll spend forever trying to convince you that I'm different if you'd give me the chance." Ali replied.

"What about kids?" Emily questioned. "I know its sensitive, but it's crucial."

"I know, and I've thought about this. I want kids with you, Em. When I was pregnant I kept having these fantasies of what the experience would have been like if you were by my side. I don't know if I'm ready to be pregnant again, but I want a family. With you."

Emily's eyes glistened with unshed tears as she listened to Ali's confession. Alison stepped closer and cupped the tanned girl's cheek.

"I love you, Em." She whispered sincerely.

Emily's resolve broke as she heard the words that she had longed to hear for months. She fell into Alison's embrace as the blonde girl wrapped her arms securely around the brunette's waist.

"Please don't hurt me, again." Emily whispered as she buried her face into the crook of Alison's neck. Alison rubbed her hands soothingly down Emily's back.

"I just want to make you happy, Em. That's all I want to do."

The two women stayed in that position for several more minutes, each savoring the feel of having each other in their arms again. Emily pulled back ever so slowly and her eyes locked onto Alison's lips. Slowly, she reached down and connected their lips together.

And after months of feeling lost, confused, angry and alone,

Alison finally felt like she was home.

* * *

**A/N: Awwww! Fluff! Tell me what you think! **


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